Do You Let Doubt Influence Your Decisions?

Posted 01-31-2012 at 01:15 PM by Krista

A few posts ago I mentioned that I am trying to become a surrogate mother. I also mentioned that my husband, J. is a not a fan of the idea. He worries incessantly about the process. I think his first concern is that I wasn’t particularly nice during my last pregnancy. If I ever had any doubt, his comment that the idea of me being pregnant again “terrifies” him solidified it.

In reality, I really don’t want to gain more weight—I am having a hard enough time losing the weight I gained through two pregnancies. I have classes, and two children to consider, also. What will I do if the pregnancy becomes too much for me? What if I have to be on bed rest?

In addition to that, of course there is always the possibility of having complications. I could lose an ovary, or even die. What will become of my little family then? Of my girls? Do I really want to take the risk of losing them for “someone else’s” child?

The thing is, if you really want to do something to make a difference you can’t drive yourself crazy with the “what-ifs”. There is always something that could go wrong, and always at least one person who will try to talk you out of it. But if you truly believe in what you’re doing, you can’t let that stop you. You have to push forward, even when everyone thinks you’re crazy. Is there really any consequence too steep for accomplishing something that you believe in?

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