There is no doubt about it: having a child changes you forever. It’s a no-brainer. But just how they bring about that change, and what form it takes, is different for everyone. For me, there were all the usual adjustments, like not being able to go on an impromptu vacation (we used to do that all the time!) or being able to have friends over late. We had to adjust to living off of one income so that I could stay home with the girls, and I had to get used to, well, staying home.
There’s adjusting your life to your baby’s schedule, learning what her cries mean, learning how to take care of another human being. Not to mention baby proofing! For my husband he had to become solely responsible for me and our daughter. He really grew up a lot. As an only child, he tended to get his own way, and as he has a love for video games, he tended to buy three or four brand new ones at a time. Now, since we have only one income, he waits for months, sometimes even over a year, until a game he wants is in pre-owned. He also has been known to push off his own wants in favor of buying the girls toys or ice cream.
The biggest change I noticed in myself was that I found a strength I never knew existed. Growing up I was always the mousy girl with her nose in a book. I cannot tell you how many walls I walked into because I wouldn’t put my latest novel down to watch where I was going! I got picked on a lot during my school years, and I never stuck up for myself. As any mom knows here, having a baby changes you. It brings the lioness out in you when it comes to your children.
I am working, taking classes, being a full time mother and wife. I never thought I could do that before. I have learned to stick up for myself, I have learned to go after what I want. I have found a strength, all in the name of my girls. They need me to be strong for them, but they also need me to be strong for myself so that I can teach them when they’re older. I never could see myself capable of the things I do today, but that changed because it had to.
So, what is the biggest way that having kids has changed you?