Holding My Babies

Posted 07-30-2012 at 10:35 AM by whitneywalters

There was a post going around Facebook about the benefits of holding your baby as often as you can. I of course liked and shared it because I think that no baby can be held or cuddled too much.

I know when my oldest was born I had a lot of older ladies in my church warn me that if I held him all the time he was going to be spoiled, would never learn to self sooth and would never be able to fall asleep on his own. I always just nodded my head  but went on holding him as much as I could. I never let him CIO, I would hold him and cuddle him whenever he had an owie or bad dream, I wore him in a sling until he did not like it anymore, he co-slept with us for two years, I rocked him to sleep for naps and bed time for the first two years and I still will hold him whenever he wants me to. He is six years old and is far from spoiled. He has been sleeping in his own bed without a problem for years, self soothes just fine and is over all a really good kid. I know I made the right choice to hold him whenever I could.

My second child was a difficult baby, she did cry a lot, she seemed to nurse around the clock,¬† she wanted held only by me and there were times I wondered if she was ever going to outgrow it. She is almost five now, she is still a mama’s girl but she has outgrown a lot of her neediness. I know that she was a needy baby and one of her needs was being held. Being in my arms was a comfort, it made her happy and I was not going to make her lay down somewhere and cry. Holding her was an easy fix, it made her happy and her being happy made everyone else happier.

My third child was very easy going. She was happy to be held, to lay in her crib, play on the floor or anything else. She just turned three and is still pretty easy going. She still does want rocked to sleep and most nights still comes into our bed in the middle of night but we are okay with that. We know that she is still really young and she still needs the closeness of being with us.

My youngest just turned a year and she spends a large portion of the day in my arms or on my lap still. She loves to play with her brother and sisters but she is happiest in my arms. She is the happiest of all the kids at this age. She smiles a lot, laughs a lot and is just a really happy child. I nurse her or rock her to sleep for naps and bed time still. She will sleep in her crib if I lay her in there but most of the time we just bring her to bed with us. She loves to snuggle with anyone. She loves being held in my arms or the sling and over all just wants to be close to people.

I do think that my kids are living proof that no child can be held too often. None of my kids are spoiled brats they are pretty much the complete opposite. I think that the more you can hold your child, the better off they are going to be as they age. I really do think the more love they are shown, the more love they will learn to give back.

Filed Under: Mommy Talk


4 Responses to “Holding My Babies”

  1. Kabuki24 on July 30th, 2012 3:20 pm

    Very sweet! I agree, a baby can’t be held too often.

  2. lovewool on July 30th, 2012 8:04 pm

    I totally agree with you and parent my son in the same manner. He was very needy but now is almost always happy at the age of 2 years, 3 months. We are not experiencing the “terrible 2’s” that so many love to complain about. I think part of it has to do with all of the love and attention he gets from his parents.

    I love the last picture. Amelia looks so peaceful!

  3. firsttimejoy on July 31st, 2012 8:24 pm

    Thank you for this, I go through this everyday with my family. EVERYONE tells me to make sure I dont hold him all the time and to make sure I let him cry himself to sleep. I cant ever imagine letting my child suffer that way. It helps so much to know that other mommas have been through this and have perfectly balanced children.

  4. rainy111 on July 31st, 2012 9:12 pm

    Beautiful post. My littly boy, now 21 months, sounds much like your 1st. It is encouraging to hear this perspective from an experienced mom, as much of what I heard from friends and family warned against too much holding/soothing as the child would not learn to self soothe, be spoiled etc.. Its been a challenging/ tiring 20 months; with round the clock nursing/co-sleeping etc., but overall, he is a sweet, very well behaved, happy boy. Was just reading about the terrible two’s peaking between 18-24 months in “Happiest Toddler on the Block” and made me realize that we havent seen much of this behavior at all. Great to hear how well your 6 yr old is doing with independent sleep! Thanks for your post :)

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