As some of you may have read, my husband and I recently split up. I told him I needed some time away, I needed to think things over. I did end up coming back after a short time. Part of the reason is that my girls need me. We split the days and nights, me watching them when he was at work and him taking the “night shift” so to speak. The problem was that my oldest, who has nightmares, would always call for me. I didn’t want her not to have me there.
Another reason is that we have been together a long, long time. That in itself is part of the problem. As a “child” bride in some sense of the word—I was eighteen when we said our vows—I have grown and matured. Neither of us is the same person. Sometimes, as a couple you grow together and sometimes you grow apart. Needless to say, in the case with my husband I believed us to have grown apart. What can you do to repair this? In my opinion that isn’t much.
You can talk about it, you can try to reconnect. I think talking is a very important aspect of keeping couples connected.
The way I am trying to view it is that my marriage is brand new. I am not thinking about things from the past and letting it bog me down. I am only taking the present into account. It’s amazing how brand new it does feel since I made that decision. I am just taking him as he is and trying to make it work. I know that we still might fail, we still might end up going our separate ways but I can only give it my best.