Teaching Truthfulness

Posted 03-26-2013 at 11:52 AM by Krista

I don’t know about you, but my oldest daughter is at this stage where she thinks of all kinds of ways to be deceitful.  She’s four years old now, but I remember this starting when she was about two. The first time I noticed it was when I peeked in on her during her nap and saw that she was smiling, trying to pretend that she was asleep. OK, if I’m being honest I have to admit that I thought it was a little cute… sue me.

Now, over two years later, I don’t find it cute. (See, I knew that would come back to bite me!) I find it frustrating, not to mention time consuming. The lies just seem to keep coming, mostly directed towards her two year old sister. Everything she does wrong, she addresses with the line of defense, “Khalen did it.”

I heard the girls squabble earlier this morning, but when I told them to stop they did, so I didn’t investigate further. After handing out breakfast my oldest hands over a box of candy I’d bought yesterday. Her explanation was, “Khalen did it.” I won’t deny that I was pretty ticked. I informed her that I knew that wasn’t true—or she wouldn’t have the box. She insisted that Khalen had taken it, and that’s when I remembered them arguing. So, Khalen did take it, and Ali snatched it from her and then hid it so I wouldn’t find it. The trouble I had was explaining how this was deceit to my daughter.

After all, by her reasoning she did tell me the truth, and by her reasoning she wasn’t at fault because she didn’t get the box down initially. After a long talk, she admitted that Khalen hadn’t even eaten any of the candy, that was all her!

I am going to keep plugging away but I have no idea what I’m doing. I never gave much thought to how you teach these things. Does anyone have the same problem?

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