I have written in the past about how our plans for another child are still up in the air and while I know it is best to wait, is becoming really hard for me. Since getting pregnant with my first, this is the longest I have gone between pregnancies and the thought of waiting another two years makes me pretty sad. There is only 15 months between my first and second children, 23 months between my second and third and 23 months between my third and fourth.
Amelia is my youngest and she will be two years old in June. I cannot believe that my little baby is so big already. Time really seems to fly by. It is even harder to think she will be four years old before we make our final decision on a fifth child.
The decision is already made when it comes to me. I know I want another baby. My heart aches for another baby. My husband is the one that is still undecided. He says he would like another child but he worries about my health since I had complications with Amelia. We have been doing research together and the studies I have shown him have calmed some of his fears but I know nothing will calm them completely. He also wants to wait so we can buy a different car, pay down more debt and possibly move. All those things are going to take time. I do know that he is coming around more and more to the idea of another, he no longer is saying IF we have another all the time, now he is saying when and even has told me a couple names he likes.We made the deal to wait until 2015 before making the final choice, that will be our ten year wedding anniversary year. That is another reason for waiting. We want to take a trip alone, the kids we have know would be staying with my parents while we are gone and having a baby right now would change that. I would not feel comfortable leaving a child that young for a couple days, it is hard enough for me to leave Amelia for several hours. Even though I know she is well cared for, it just makes me anxious. Since we would like to have a fall baby if we have one more, I may be pregnant on our trip and the baby would be born a few months later.
So I am playing the waiting game for the next two years. In the mean time I have my little nephew to play with, my sister is pregnant again and I have a few friends that either have newborns or they are pregnant. I will be able to get my fill of babies so hopefully that will calm my baby fever a little bit.