Diaper Swappers

The judgement surrounding gender-preference is as awful and equal as that experienced toward those who remain team green and don’t show (or admit) any particular preference.

I, for one, am thrilled to be having twin boys soon. They’re not even born, yet I wouldn’t change things for the world. They’re exactly what I want! However, there was brief disappointment for me (and immense pride for my husband) when two little boy-things showed up on the ultrasound screen.

For months leading up to that, I assured everyone that (at least) one of them was a girl. Why? Because I had decided such. Well, apparently I didn’t decide hard enough, and we’re most certainly having two little men! LOL.

Not having a girl this time around has been such a blessing… I’m thrilled, genuinely. These guys are EXACTLY what our family wants and needs!

But I also can’t wait for our next child… which will most definitely be a girl, at long last. Because I’ve decided so. Hehe.

I can completely understand your desire. After 3 wonderful boys, my husband and I longed for a daughter. We decided that we were going to try have one more baby to even up the household number. I researched online how to try for a girl. After reading about the timing and tricks we decided to use lime juice, mostly withdrawn, and a few days prior to ovulation. Well we got our little girl. Now we will never know if it was going to happen anyway or if our crazy ways helped. We were going to be done and happy either way but are certainly glad to have the opportunity to have a daughter.

I think there is ZERO wrong with yearning, I think there is ZERO wrong with wanting, being disappointed for a bit if you don’t get what you want, and then be able to move on and enjoy the blessing a child is. I’ve never understood why people need to demonize moms for acknowledging a want or emotion, if we don’t acknowledge things how can we grow and learn and love?
Personally, I want nothing more then another little girl or two or three, I could do with a whole houseful of girls, and I don’t think there is anything wrong with that! Just like I couldn’t look down on anyone who wanted (or only has) boys. I hope you get your little boy!

I am doing the same thing for opposite results I love my 2 little boys and I have always wanted two boys and a girl, so now it is time to try for my girl People give me looks like the only reason we are having another, (ttc #3) is to have a girl, but it isn’t true. If I knew with 100% certainty #3 would be a boy I would want #3 just as much as I do now. But while we TTC #3 why not try some girl “methods” for fun. I also know I will mourn not ever having a daughter, but will not love a 3rd son any less. Thanks for your post!

I am looking into the same thing but for a girl. I am in the process of adopting and it looks like my second will be as boy as well. So for the third and last I am trying something different and hope to get a girl as a result. I love my boy but gender disappointment can be very strong and difficult to overcome.

I’m surprised you get odd looks and comments for wanting a child of the opposite gender. With my latest pregnancy(3rd boy) I got comment after comment about how I needed a girl, and even when they found out I was carrying a girl instead of congratulations over my boy I’d inevitably get a comment about our plans to try again for a girl. We’re done with our 3 boys but if we were trying for a 4th, yes I’d be hoping for a girl but I’d still be happy if we had a boy. As long as the desire doesn’t grow into a true disappointment in your child you receive there’s nothing wrong with the initial desire.

My husband and I have always talked about having two kids and we would be done. Our first was a boy and I was totally hoping for a girl for our second….we are having another boy! At first I was a little disappointed but after a day I was and am sooo excited to have two boys, it will be fun! I feel like I did do some mourning (and still do from time to time) knowing that I will never have a daughter, but I do feel so blessed for our family that God has given us, wouldn’t change it for the world : ) Thanks for this post!

I am in the exact same boat! 2 beautiful girls, and we are only having one more regardless, so have our fingers and toys crossed for a boy, and are trying all the ‘tricks’ too!

Thank you for this…we’re having our 2nd boy and most likely our last child. In my heart I wanted a girl so badly to complete my “perfect family” of an older brother, younger sister. I don’t tell anyone this though because I feel guilty, as if I don’t love our son to be. I am SO EXCITED that our son gets to have a brother and with only two kids, I think it will be great for them. But I still grieve over my girl.

I think this is on a lot of our minds as moms. I wanted a boy first, and then a girl. I got a girl first and… have another girl on the way. I was so looking forward to having a son – seeing the differences, learning what it was that my mom and brother had. Now I’m not sure if we’ll try for a third – I’m not sure I want another little girl. So, yes, I have done a bit of mourning for an experience I might never have, but I’ll love my girls to pieces through it all.

Thanks so much Mamas this was so encouraging to read!! Good luck to you all hoping you get your boy/girl that you long for!

We have 3 girls, and while I wouldn’t trade them for any boys, I wanted a boy badly.

I have 3 boys already and I was a big fat baby when we found out ds3 was a boy. I wouldn’t even pick out his name. I am ashamed of how I acted now but I wouldn’t tell anyone or post of Facebook or anything because I was so upset. I love that little boy to the moon. He just turned one and is the sweetest, cutest, most amazing little guy ever BUT we are planning to try for a girl this fall. Maybe I’ll look into that book!

I’m adopted so we are thinking about that in the future. There are so many babies out there that need a good home. I wouldn’t be here if I wasn’t adopted by a family.

I know exactly how you feel. I have two girls that I couldn’t imagine life without but would really like our third baby to be a boy. My husband really wanted our first to be a boy but it didn’t matter to me.

I think what can make random strangers uncomfortable is the concern that someone who REEALLLY wants one gender and gets the other, won’t love the child. People who know you wouldn’t think that but acquaintances might.

Our docs won’t even tell us the gender of a baby until 24weeks because terminating pregnancies late in the 2nd trimester isn’t unheard of for some people who want a specific gender.

I appreciate this sentiment. I have “my” girl and boy, and I’m grateful. My husband had a strong preference to have a boy and when I found out we were having a boy during the US I confess I was relieved. After he found out we would have a boy, he confessed to me that he made his peace with having another girl and that he imagined being a daddy to two lovely ladies and enjoyed that thought too. Still, I’m glad to have “one of each.”

Oh my gosh, I would never, ever terminate just because it wasn’t the gender I wanted. I think most people feel that way, but even so, it doesn’t stop you from hoping.

I UNDERSTANDM FROM AN OPPOSITE PLACE! I have 5 girls and everyone including family,complete strangers,and even my husband are positive that I “need” a boy. Truth be told, I never wanted a boy and although I’d like some more children, I’m scared to because I know the odds are slimmer and slimmer that it will be another girl. I LOVE girls and have no desire whatsoever to have both sexes. If a boy comes my way I’m sure I’ll love him to death BUT I’m not praying for one.

This made me smile! Thank you for reading and sharing your experience! It is good to hear from the opposite side! You know, I read a magazine article once where a woman had two boys and everyone kept saying she needed a girl. She didn’t “get it” until she had one! Hopefully, the same will happen for you if you have a boy!

I raised 3 girls in my first marriage. I grew up with 2 sisters and 1 brother (who was a few years older). I never really understood boys and was happy to have just girls…..and then when I got divorced, I remarried a man with 2 boys…still did not really understand boys. When we were expecting our first together, dh wanted a girl, and I hoped for another girl as well…I cried when I discovered I was having a boy….but not because I was unhappy, but because I did not realize until that moment how much I really wanted a little boy of my own!! And then dh got his girl a couple years later and then I got another boy! Would I have been happy with just girls? Of course! But I sure am glad to have boys as well!

I ‘wanted’ a boy both times so far – I love my girls but would be lying if I said I wasn’t a bit disappointed. If I get a 3rd girl so be it, I am done but I am definitely hoping my last has some extra junk, lol.

Honestly, I would give you a weird look if I saw your book also, because Shettles Method makes absolutely no sense to me. My reaction would have nothing to do with your desire for one sex over an other that I think is quite common.

I would love to have a girl next but will be happy with what ever we get. So I can sympathize with your desire for a boy.

I totally understand you!!! I do not see anything wrong to wish for a certain sex. I hoped 3 times for a girl, all I ever wanted was a girl. When my 3rd showed he was a boy again, I cried for 48 hours straight. And I am not shy to tell that story. Yes, of course: I love them, I am blessed, I could not imagine one of them being somebody different, blablabla, still, I wanted I GIRL.

I have one sister and my sister has three girls. On my side, it’s been a little while since anyone had a boy. I really wanted a son, and of course my husband did, too. We weren’t sure (and still aren’t) if we would have more than one kid, so we wanted to give it the best shot that we would have a boy first.

I followed the book you are reading, got pregnant on my first try ever, and today we have a wild and crazy 21 month old son! As the book will say, it’s not a 100% guarantee, but it will up your chances dramatically!

What is really funny, is I don’t think I’ll try for either gender if we have another. Either will be wonderful and I want to go team green all the way!

Best of luck to you, and it can’t hurt to try!

I do not want a son. I want to clarify here and now I am expecting, and would adore a son as much as I do my two daughters. I do not want a son because my husband prizes a son so much I fear for all 5 of his daughters. I have seen what he does when he’s just allowed to have free time with little boys, even when his daughters are right there and begging for his attention. I crushes me. I am against having a boy not because I personally don’t want one ( I wanted my first to be a girl, but my second I held out hope it was a son, it was a lovely daughter, and I adore her to the moon and back.) but because I fear for the other kids. Just a view of someone with 2/5 girls in her household. I actually have lost sleep over the issue the closer we get to my gender U/s. Husband said he didn’t realize he was doing it and has sworn to me if it’s a son, he will do everything in his power not to allow it to happen again. IF it is a boy, and if he can keep this promise, then I’d be over joyed to welcome a baby boy. It would make him so happy. I just wish our little girls brought his as much joy as I know a boy would bring him. He’s determined this one is a girl though and is practicing girl names on my belly

Hugs, Mama! I could have written this post. We are not TTC yet, my girls are only 1 and 3. But I would really like a boy next!

I’m on the other side of this totaly.after having three MC’s I didn’t care what it was as long as we made it out alive. And now that I have my perfect baby girl, and had a delivery that might have made it imposible for me to have more kids. I’m still ok. We are planing on trying for #2 and I can honestly say that I still don’t care if it’s a boy or a girl. Honest I don’t. I do hope that they love animals though!
I do however know someone who wanted a boy. So baddly that both of her daughters (she was hoping for a boy both times) know it. She is the reason that people get queesed out when they see someone who is “hoping for X”. Most people arent like the person I know. But the few who are give a bad name to everyone who does have a hope for one or the other. Just my .02