Cloth Diapers & Parenting Community -

Cloth Diapers & Parenting Community - (
-   Breastfeeding Support (
-   -   BFing at a funeral (

greenkmt 07-24-2006 01:47 AM

BFing at a funeral
OK- First let me say that I am going to RANT! Just so you know, my BIL is an A.

This is what happened... My son is 21 months old. My husbands family has been being jerks to me for quite sometime now. It has to do with the fact that I feed my DC very healthily:headscratch: don't ask me why? I don't really know why it pisses them off so bad but I hear about it ALL of the time. It is so bad that they started to try and break up my husband and I. They tried to convince him that some bruises on his head had to have been me abusing my DS. My husband is so mad at them. It has gotten to the point that we have had to cut off unsupervised contact with the IL and our DS.

I could NEVER abuse my son. If they knew me they would know that I practice gentle dicipline, don't spank, or anything. It is just rediculous. Anyway, my husbands brother 'K' has been especially bad.

Well, last week I think it was Wednesday, my DH aunt went into the hospital. It was bad. I went to the hospital for my DH because he is 2 hours away working and I was really nice to the family I hugged my MIL and my BIL who were there and I told them how very sorry I was and everything. I thought that maybe things would start to settle down now that they were seeing that I was a great mom and I was suppostive of the family (I didn't have to go for my DH aunt, I hadn't even met her.

Anyway, DH aunt died and her funeral was on Saturday. I went again for DH because he couldn't get off work.

HERE IT GOES! I walk into the chapel. I am beckoned by my BIL and SIL to sit by them. (I brought DS because my MIL wanted me to, bad thought to be but who am I to know, I am ONLY HIS MOTHER!!!:banghead: )

I go any sit by them and almost immediately, my son starts to ramble. It is SILENT and I am giving him cherrios and nothing is stopping the low mumblings. So what do I do? What comes naturally! I VERY, VERY decretly start to nurse him. NO ONE CAN TELL! I am serious I am not usually very descrete but without my husband there, I didn't want to have anyone noticing that I was nursing.

THEN! My BIL (whom is sitting next to me) leans over and says in a hostle tone. "DON'T YOU THINK YOU SHOULD LEAVE? THAT IS VERY DISRESPECTFUL!" OMGosh I couldn't believe it! I just ignored him and when DS finished, he was still being noisy so I left!

What would you do now? I am SOOOO MAD! Sorry for this being so long!:goodvibes: I appreciate any responses...:hugs:

skayers01 07-24-2006 03:05 AM

Re: BFing at a funeral
Yes, I'm sure she was looking down on you from Heaven, disgusted that you would feed your son. How rude of you. Next time let him go hungry, geez! LOL

What you should have done was take off your top and start up and down the aisles screaming "No, this is rude!" :hugegrin:

Lucky Child 07-24-2006 09:40 AM

Re: BFing at a funeral
I don't know, but maybe you shouldn't be around these people anymore... maybe it's to the point that you need to cut off contact? They sound like they are just out to get you and that's not good for you, your dh or your ds.

hauser 07-24-2006 09:58 AM

Re: BFing at a funeral
I agree that you should just try to stay away. I guess holidays might be hard, but other wise why torture yourself. If your dh stands up for you, then maybe just limit the time with them to only when he is there. There is no reason you should have to put yourself or your child in that situation!! Breasfeeding is natural, that is what they are there for, not mens amusement!!:giggle: Don't feel ashamed of that!!

Hayley 07-24-2006 10:03 AM

Re: BFing at a funeral

Originally Posted by skayers01
Yes, I'm sure she was looking down on you from Heaven, disgusted that you would feed your son. How rude of you. Next time let him go hungry, geez! LOL

What you should have done was take off your top and start up and down the aisles screaming "No, this is rude!" :hugegrin:


tatumsmom 07-24-2006 10:04 AM

Re: BFing at a funeral
Maybe it is just this town. I too live in Sprgfld & the other day some older lady told me, "you really should not do that in public"...I was in a desolate corner on the mall and was very descrete..I agree w/ pp..maybe you should not be around them. They sound a little nuts, IMO.:goodvibes: You keep on doing what is best for you child!!:hugs:

hauser 07-24-2006 10:09 AM

Re: BFing at a funeral
aww I feel homesick...all you missourians

greenkmt 07-24-2006 10:11 AM

Re: BFing at a funeral
I have started to cut off contact with his family but it is really hard for me because I have to learn NOT to like them. KWIM? I really do love his family. It is such a hard thing to do also because my DH is a mamma's boy.

greenkmt 07-24-2006 10:15 AM

Re: BFing at a funeral
I am just like, I want to slap him! What an iddiot!

Kimmomy2dom 07-24-2006 10:28 AM

Re: BFing at a funeral
I would cut off contact, too. I've pretty much done that with my ILs except to get addresses to send birth announcements, etc. I guess they still talk to my DH but he's really busy and doesn't have time to go see them, either.
I'm so sorry he said that - was he particularly close to that aunt? He may have been pretty upset already and just couldn't control what was coming out of his mouth? I'm trying to think of the best of people, but if it's a long-term problem I'm just being ridiculous.
Don't worry -I would NEVER leave any of my children alone with my ILs, and all of that stuff would REALLY tick me off!! I'm so sorry you have to deal with it! I hope they learn to deal with it - or you can keep yourself away from them more often? I applaud you for being so attentive and nice during their family members death/funeral. It would be hard for me to be that nice with such a bad history behind us.
LOL, I'm in Iowa - that's CLOSE to Missouri!!

All times are GMT -6. The time now is 12:47 PM.

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2019, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.