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shortcake2386 10-09-2012 04:10 PM

Re: Having trouble after baby #2
yup but mine is #4 and 3 months old. i keep telling myself its bc she has health issues and it WILL get better. sometimes that helps lol. dh has the car during the week and is gone 12+ hours a day for work so we are just stuck all day. every day. :( i do have friends who come over for playdates every week or so and it helps to have another adult to talk to for a little bit.

Computermama 10-09-2012 04:14 PM

Re: Having trouble after baby #2
You're not alone. DD2 is about the same age as your LO, and it's hard to go from 1 to 2. My oldest is turning 5, so she's reasonably self sufficient and in kindy every other day, but damn it's still tough. DD2 sleeps well at night, but I have to make sure the stars align just right to get the child to nap during the day, which makes getting anything at all done impossible. It's not at all uncommon for me to spend the afternoon in my darkened bedroom trying to nurse the baby down for hours. This child is very much the velcro baby - she's very attached to me, which is great, but not so great when mommy needs a break, or like today is sick. I try to get out to playgroups and get out of the house at least for short periods every day - it helps everyone's mood, mine included. Dh also takes care of the girls for a couple hours on monday nights to let me get down to the Y for a swim class alone. I have to leave a bottle of pumped milk for him, but it's worth it.

babymakes3.4.5.... 10-09-2012 04:33 PM

I have to back up a PP that mentioned post partum depression. I know there is such a stigma associated with it but if you do have it, getting help will make SO MUCH difference! I didn't want to acknowledge it in myself and didn't get help after DS1 until a friend was kind enough to tell me that she had gone through it and that it's ok to have it and need help! After I found that out, and with DHs prompting, I was able to get the help I needed without thinking that I was an awful mom bc I had it. And you don't have to have all of the symptoms or even the "normal" symptoms to have it!

All that said, it could just be the transition, and yes it is hard! I didn't have any mom groups I belonged to when DS1 was born so I would go to the local coffee shop, get a drink, pick up a magazine, and people watch for a while. It does do wonders to just get out of the house!

Sending hugs mama! This stage is rough but it does get better!!!!

SaraElise 10-09-2012 05:00 PM

Re: Having trouble after baby #2
Going from 1-2 was SO hard for me. I was literally in survival mode for a year.

When it comes to getting out, the best thing to do is just do it, and do it regularly. Even if it is just a super quick trip somewhere, making that part of your routine to leave the house a few times a week helps so much.

I would get everything ready to go right before/during nap time and then as soon as the baby is awake/changed/fed get out of the house.

It does get easier now. I have 3 and watch a friends son and it's no big deal to pack up the car and leave with all 4 of them

Terra 10-09-2012 05:05 PM

Re: Having trouble after baby #2
:hugs: It was very hard for me going from 1 to 2. And I started having PPD after the second and it wasn't diagnosed until a few years later!

My first child sounds a lot like your babe though. All on his own he just wanted to sleep at certain times and we literally had to do our lives around that. We could not take him out after 5pm because he wanted to do his night time routine and be in bed by 7pm. Things like that.

I don't have much in the way of advice other than if you can find a way to do the story times or play groups between those nap times maybe do it. Even getting out and taking a walk in the sun can help. I do know that as both of mine have grown and gotten older it has gotten easier. When they were little it was so very hard. They were 19 months apart and good golly, I thought I was going to go crazy!

Sheagirl 10-10-2012 05:51 AM

Re: Having trouble after baby #2
I have been taking St. Johns Wort. My Dr. gave me zoloft but I had a REALLY bad reaction to it. It is just nice to know I am not the only mom that goes through this. Maybe one day I will even entertain the idea of having another one.

luvsviola 10-10-2012 06:17 AM

Re: Having trouble after baby #2
Mama, I would call your doc and just talk to him/her about it again. If you feel stressed all the time, your kiddos are going to pick up on it.

Have you considered puttting the oldest in a Mothers Day Out kind of program 1 or 2 days a week so you can relax some? My kids all started going at 18 months old and love it (love playing with other kids, love their teachers) and it gives us some sanity time.

My kiddos are 5, 3 (special needs) and 1, and we all need a break every once in awhile! DD2 starting MDO meant my mom (aka daycare) can go to the groccery or the dentist in peace.

BeccaSueCongdon 10-18-2012 01:31 AM

How you doing, mama?

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