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-   -   Spinoff... gentle discipline & so on... (http://www.diaperswappers.com/forum/showthread.php?t=12271)

Gavin&Brent'sMommy 06-07-2006 07:10 AM

Spinoff... gentle discipline & so on...
 
Okay someone mentioned gentle parenting, which made me think of gentle discipline... so all you crunchy/AP mommas, do you spank/believe in spanking?

geckoed 06-07-2006 08:13 AM

Re: Spinoff... gentle discipline & so on...
 
we don't think people are made for hitting.

jennyofthemoon 06-07-2006 08:16 AM

Re: Spinoff... gentle discipline & so on...
 
Nope. All living creatures deserve respect. Just as I don't allow my kids to hit treest and kick plants, they are not allowed to abuse each other.

On a side note, it really irks me when I see a parent pick up their kid who has just hit another child, whack them and say "don't hit". Talk about a confusing message!:headscratch:

keegans_mommy 06-07-2006 08:18 AM

Re: Spinoff... gentle discipline & so on...
 
We use to spank, believed it was the ONLY way to disipline but now we have totally changed!

I think the turning point for me was when I swatted keegan and he swatted me right back! It really, really made me think and I had a complete change of heart. So now we have changed the way we deal with correcting our children and it's helped in some ways and in others we have had to really get creative with consequences but there is always a way to deal with children who are testing their water, parents patience and with them growing up and learning along the way. :)

Luv2bemommy 06-07-2006 08:43 AM

Re: Spinoff... gentle discipline & so on...
 
I used to spank.. Seeing is was the way I was brought up, I really didnt know any better? Then I started reading on AP and such and I'm trying SO hard not to spank anymore.. I cant remember the last time one of the kids have gotten a spanking actually.. I do tend to yell alot though, thats something I'm working on..

MamaStace 06-07-2006 08:48 AM

Re: Spinoff... gentle discipline & so on...
 
DH and I agree not to spank. Sometimes, in anger (which is the WORST time to spank!) I have swatted dd's bottom. I've always felt awful later. I have a friend who spanks as discipline, and while it seems to work for her, I feel horrible and guilty and miserable after I've tried it. So we use time out. And I also find that I can 90% of the time defuse a situation before it gets to "punishment" level. I see a lot of myself in dd, and I usually hug her when she's getting upset and that helps sooo much. When I put her in time out, she sits for 2 minutes (1 minute for every year of her age) and then we talk about why she's in time out, what to do next time, and then she's "released" with a hug. It's gentle, humane and speaks at her level.

Gavin&Brent'sMommy 06-07-2006 01:53 PM

Re: Spinoff... gentle discipline & so on...
 
see we spanked DSS, once he was old enough (I cannot comprehend ppl who spank a baby) anyhow, not so much anymore, cause I hate it, thing is, once Gavin is old enough, I don't want to either, but I'm afraid hubby will say he's getting different treatment cause he's my own, (since Cody used to get spanked) I dunno how to approach it with him, course it won't be a concern for a few years but I was thinking about it lately

SheilaJoy 06-07-2006 02:02 PM

Re: Spinoff... gentle discipline & so on...
 
We don't spank regularly, or for minor offenses. But we do believe it is an appropriate method of discipline sometimes. We also don't think it is inherently wrong because the Bible advocates spanking, so it fits in with our beliefs.

lilmama2dsndd 06-07-2006 02:07 PM

Re: Spinoff... gentle discipline & so on...
 
I used to spank DS and I have MAJOR guilt issues because of it :cry: . I stopped when his DCP told me that he had gotten mad at another child for taking his toy and DS "spanked" him. Of course I knew that he learned it from me :dontlikeit: and seeing how I don't want him to hit others, I don't hit him. I grew up with spankings and always reasoned that if it never hurt me... well it does hurt me, I remember how terrible I would feel after popping DS on the bottom or his hand or whatever and he started freaking out and crying. :banghead: I feel like i was such a bad mama for doing that to him! We are now using gentle discipline. If he does something he isn't supposed to, and doesn't stop after I ask, I get down on his level, hold his hands and tell him why it was wrong :nono: . They I have him repeat "no ______" three times. We hug, I have him hug & apologize to whatever, whoever he hurt and move to the next activity. It has not been the easiest transition but I am very proud of myself for stopping this chain of bad parenting.

Gavin&Brent'sMommy 06-07-2006 02:10 PM

Re: Spinoff... gentle discipline & so on...
 
:hugs:
Quote:

Originally Posted by amandalynn
I used to spank DS and I have MAJOR guilt issues because of it :cry: . I stopped when his DCP told me that he had gotten mad at another child for taking his toy and DS "spanked" him. Of course I knew that he learned it from me :dontlikeit: and seeing how I don't want him to hit others, I don't hit him. I grew up with spankings and always reasoned that if it never hurt me... well it does hurt me, I remember how terrible I would feel after popping DS on the bottom or his hand or whatever and he started freaking out and crying. :banghead: I feel like i was such a bad mama for doing that to him! We are now using gentle discipline. If he does something he isn't supposed to, and doesn't stop after I ask, I get down on his level, hold his hands and tell him why it was wrong :nono: . They I have him repeat "no ______" three times. We hug, I have him hug & apologize to whatever, whoever he hurt and move to the next activity. It has not been the easiest transition but I am very proud of myself for stopping this chain of bad parenting.



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