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-   -   3 month old fighting naps PLEASE HELP! (http://www.diaperswappers.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1247540)

arhodes728 07-20-2011 09:41 AM

3 month old fighting naps PLEASE HELP!
 
hey mamas!

am i driving you crazy yet? this is my 3rd thread on the BFing forum in a week!

DD is 12 1/2 weeks old and went through a growth spurt at 11 weeks which just seems like its tapering off. she was fussy from about 2 weeks to 8 weeks and from 8 to 11 weeks she was pretty much easy-going! napped twice a day - first time on a stroll through the neighborhood and the 2nd time would be sometime in the middle of the afternoon and she would sometimes nod off early at night and then id nurse her and put her down around 9. the fussiness started back at 11 weeks and i attributed it to a growth spurt. now she's almost 13 weeks though and the fussiness is getting worse. i've figured out finally that she is overtired because she's been refusing to nap.

her sleep patterns are definitely changing. she no longer will nap during the stroll so i cut it out, thinking that maybe by this point she had gone too long without napping and needed to be put down earlier for a nap so we tried that. sometimes it would work sometimes it wouldn't. i know its a timing thing. if i wait too long its really hard to get her to sleep but too early and she won't sleep for long.

so i'm thinking she's maybe ready for regular naps - morning and afternoon. but there are 2 different schools of thought on how to go about that - put her down drowsy to let her cry it out mid-morning and early afternoon for a few days to get her in the habit of sleeping or nurse her to sleep and comfort her when she awakes crying to try to get her back to sleep. i'm sure there are more ideas about this but these are the two i am wrestling with right now.

FYI she sleeps GREAT at night! she goes to bed around 830 and sleeps until 630! but daytime sleep is a battle. and if she doesn't nap she gets so overtired and fussy that it breaks my heart - she screams bloody murder a few times a day. and i know she needs that daytime sleep. plus it makes me super on edge and in a terrible mood by mid-afternoon.

this morning i tried putting her down when she looked sleepy - around 815. she had woken up at 630 and nursed for 45 minutes and then i ate bfast, talked to her while she was in her swing and gave her a bath and got her dressed for the day (our usual routine) and then we went outside and i had my coffee and talked to her about her surroundings (trying to provide lots of stimulation so she would be tired). i thought she might be ready for a nap before her next feeding so i rocked her a little and she drifted off with a paci so i put her down in her crib and quietly left the room. she woke up 10 minutes later crying but i let her cry while i showered and dressed. 30 min passed and she was still crying so i got her and fed her and she fell asleep after nursing this time so i tried putting her down again since she didn't sleep the first time. this time we had more success. she stayed asleep about 15 or 20 minutes, woke up crying and i instantly went in to soothe her (put the paci back in her mouth and rubbed her tummy - didn't pick her up) and she nodded back off pretty quickly. she is still asleep now and it has been about 15 minutes since i checked on her last so i'm thinking maybe this is the way to go for now - to keep nursing her to sleep during the day?

what has been successful for you? i want her to be able to self soothe but i also want her to get the rest she needs during the day. should i continue the nursing to sleep schedule or try to gradually start an eat/wake/sleep routine with her? i want what's BEST for her but i also need to consider what i can handle - CIO is tough for me. i keep wondering if maybe she's hungry instead of too tired to sleep. i nurse her to sleep at night so i know she's used to that. i want to know how you worked it out! i want to nurse on demand but i also want to get her on a schedule as much as possible to help us enjoy our time together more because right now, we're both struggling!

carolineb 07-20-2011 03:14 PM

I posted a thread just like this not too long ago on the parenting forum. My ds is 4 months and I have been battling the same thing for 2 months!. He sleeps well at might but the daytime naps are few and short unless I wear him. That just doesnt work all the time. Most of the mamas told me even 4 months was too young to CIO. I'm going to chat with his pedi at his next appt in a little over a week. We'll see. Not sure what to tell you other than CIO may be too early for her age but I think it's a personal decision. GL!

VeganCupcake 07-20-2011 06:31 PM

Re: 3 month old fighting naps PLEASE HELP!
 
I have found that in a really young baby, that morning nap comes really quickly after waking up in the morning--like within 45 minutes to an hour. If you miss that window, it will be harder to soothe her to sleep and hard for her to stay asleep.

Also, a baby that young will often take short naps--maybe 45 minutes long--and either need to be soothed back to sleep or can get up for a short while (90 minutes) and then go back to sleep. My DD at that age was taking 5 short naps a day. That's a normal variation, though not very convenient for getting anything much done.

Anyway, a baby that age definitely needs 3 naps a day, not just 2.

Mara'sMommy 07-20-2011 09:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by VeganCupcake
I have found that in a really young baby, that morning nap comes really quickly after waking up in the morning--like within 45 minutes to an hour. If you miss that window, it will be harder to soothe her to sleep and hard for her to stay asleep.

Also, a baby that young will often take short naps--maybe 45 minutes long--and either need to be soothed back to sleep or can get up for a short while (90 minutes) and then go back to sleep. My DD at that age was taking 5 short naps a day. That's a normal variation, though not very convenient for getting anything much done.

Anyway, a baby that age definitely needs 3 naps a day, not just 2.

Agreed. My dd is 4 and 1/2 months and takes anywhere from 3 to 5 naps a day, sometimes as short as 25 mins or as long as 3 hours.

But she is a horrible sleeper and will not sleep if put her down, so I mostly hold her through all her naps. The second I put her down she wakes up and will not go back to sleep. I gave up. I'd rather have her well rested. I also think 3 months is way too young for CIO, but I'm not really in favor of CIO for any age.

rachelanne820 07-20-2011 09:28 PM

Re: 3 month old fighting naps PLEASE HELP!
 
I don't like CIO - I usually nurse DD in bed and she falls asleep. When DH is watching her, he rocks her then lays her down in the bed. She is 3 and a half months old and is a good night sleeper, too. Her naps have no schedule - but neither does her feeding. We just do what ever she wants!!

We did this with DS and he eventually made his own sleep schedule. Never really did get on a feeding schedule...just fed when he seemed hungry.

DS was fussy alot. Turns out it was gas. DD got fussy a little at first so I stopped eating dairy and she is fine now. Hardley ever fusses but still has lots of gas but she is able to pass it.

I would just put her to sleep how ever she likes...when ever she seems tired.

arhodes728 07-21-2011 11:04 AM

Yeah she won't nap even when she is tired though. If I can get her to fall asleep she won't stay asleep so she works herself into an overtired state that causes her to wail like she's in pain. I just don't know what else to do. Im so sick of working off of no schedule. I just don't operate well and I honestly feel like she would benefit from one bc she struggles so much to sleep so she's fussy all of the time almost. I kind of feel like people who are so anti-CIO never had a super fussy baby but maybe I'm wrong. she's just miserable and I want to help her.

UnschoolingFamily 07-21-2011 11:22 AM

I would never CIO such a young baby. Honestly, 30 minutes of crying for a 3 month old is a lot. I know some babies are collicky but your baby simply didn't want to be alone and you ignored her request (at least that is what she was thinking).

My 8 1/2 month old falls asleep nursing (in bed with me) or in the baby swing or in the car while driving. We have an ocean sounds white noise feature on an alarm clock and we have ocean sounds in our bedroom for many hours every day. When My baby gets overly tired and I know she needs rest, I put her in the baby swing wrapped up tight (similar to Happiest Baby style)and with a pacifier in her mouth, with some loud ocean sounds going and I (or DH) swing her manually, while smiling at her, singing songs, kissing her feet when she swings near us. More often than not, she falls asleep within 2 minutes.

I sort of think it's a mistake for you to take away her walks if she doesn't fall asleep. She has just gotten older and is more interested in looking around. The fresh air is good for her, and will only lead to tuckering her out more.

UnschoolingFamily 07-21-2011 11:23 AM

By the way, have you watched the happiest baby on the block video? If not, please do. Sooo helpful!

arhodes728 07-21-2011 11:39 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by UnschoolingFamily
I would never CIO such a young baby. Honestly, 30 minutes of crying for a 3 month old is a lot. I know some babies are collicky but your baby simply didn't want to be alone and you ignored her request (at least that is what she was thinking).

My 8 1/2 month old falls asleep nursing (in bed with me) or in the baby swing or in the car while driving. We have an ocean sounds white noise feature on an alarm clock and we have ocean sounds in our bedroom for many hours every day. When My baby gets overly tired and I know she needs rest, I put her in the baby swing wrapped up tight (similar to Happiest Baby style)and with a pacifier in her mouth, with some loud ocean sounds going and I (or DH) swing her manually, while smiling at her, singing songs, kissing her feet when she swings near us. More often than not, she falls asleep within 2 minutes.

I sort of think it's a mistake for you to take away her walks if she doesn't fall asleep. She has just gotten older and is more interested in looking around. The fresh air is good for her, and will only lead to tuckering her out more.

We haven't stopped strolling I'm just figuring out how to incorporate them better now as far as timing goes. She enjoys it and I'm not taking that from her. Im not wanting her to CIO this early I was speaking on that in general. I'm going to try swaddling her before naps bc she seems to be squirming herself awake.

arhodes728 07-21-2011 11:39 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by UnschoolingFamily
By the way, have you watched the happiest baby on the block video? If not, please do. Sooo helpful!

I haven't but I'll check it out! Thanks!


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