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Isaac2009 08-01-2011 12:13 AM

Any advice on explaining bf-ing to my 3yr old?
She did horribly when I had my 20mth old, but she was younger then too. She would literally scream and cry, yank him away from me, hit him, try to drag him in the floor etc! It made for a VERY stressful time for me, as you ladies can imagine!
Well I started talking to her when I was 25wks pregnant this time (I am now 33wks) about bfing! She has picked up on the idea that there is milk in my "boobies" that the baby will drink, and according to her one is strawberry and one is chocolate milk :giggle2:

Just in case things go bad once Colin gets here are there any tips you guys can offer for making it easier for her to understand? Maybe things I can do with her while I bf the new little one? There will also be my 20mth around but I don't think he will have a hard time with it like she did....

Thanks :goodvibes:

MeCo7707 08-01-2011 01:21 AM

Re: Any advice on explaining bf-ing to my 3yr old?
There is a breastfeeding doll...then maybe she can nurse her baby while you nurse yours :hugs: hopefully she is able to understand better and won't be as jealous this time.

Greenbabybottoms 08-01-2011 07:06 AM

Re: Any advice on explaining bf-ing to my 3yr old?
I always keep a special basket of toys that my kids are only allowed to play with while I'm nursing the younger baby. Also I use that time to say "Pick out a movie and we'll snuggle up and watch it together" and sometimes I'll even pull out a special treat (m&ms or something like that). Also maybe special art projects for them to do while you nurse. I've found if I can just make that time special for them too then they handle it better. I think it's just very important to make sure they have something fun or special to do while you are nursing.

poopstermomma 08-01-2011 07:28 AM

Re: Any advice on explaining bf-ing to my 3yr old?
My DD is 2 1/2 , and my newborn is 6 weeks-eek! We talked about her fav. foods, and how mommy milk will be baby's fav. food. Here are some things I've said to stave off the jealousy:
She's eating, would you like a snack, too?
Baby is hungry, but when she's done, we can go play.
Do you want to sing to baby while she eats?
We can read a book- you'll have to hold the book, big sister. (using the term "big sister" adjusts her mood and makes her more kind and generous! :) )
Oh, baby is cold, can you get her a blanket while she eats? Or a toy? Or a book? Or cook her something in your kitchen?Or draw her a picture? (get toddler to be be helpful or to create soemthing for baby while you are nursing)

*I have to say that we have had some random conversations about her breasts making milk(pink milk) and that she will share it with us. Also, she wanted to see Daddy's milk... oh, and she asked to taste my milk- I would have been fine with her latching on, but she really just wanted a drop on her finger. "yummy good".
All in all, a LOT less jealousy than I was bracing myself for. It'll be okay!!

VeganCupcake 08-01-2011 10:14 AM

Re: Any advice on explaining bf-ing to my 3yr old?
How about some books about babies breastfeeding? We had a few that we read together and I think they helped my DD a bit (my DD was still nursing when baby was born, though, so YMMV).

Mama's Milk
We Like to Nurse
We Like to Nurse Too
What Baby Needs

I second the basket of special toys/books/snacks that just comes out when baby needs to nurse. It makes it a special time for everybody.

Swimmingly 08-01-2011 06:32 PM

Re: Any advice on explaining bf-ing to my 3yr old?
ODD had just turned 3 when her sister was born. When I would nurse the baby ODD would sit on my other side and we would read books together. She felt like she was getting special time too, and she wasn't bored. That worked really well until baby was about 5/6 months old and started getting too distract-able - then baby would pull off and look at her sister instead of eating. But by that point ODD was used to things and didn't throw a fit when she had to leave the room for YDD to actually eat.

Isaac2009 08-06-2011 08:44 PM

Re: Any advice on explaining bf-ing to my 3yr old?
Thanks so much ladies! And I especially like the book suggestions!!!!

She seems to be ok with talking about breast feeding now, so I am hoping if we keep talking about it then it will seem really normal to her by the time he gets here (in just a few shorts weeks now!)

tpb2930 08-14-2011 11:07 PM

I got on YouTube and showed my DD vids of puppies and kitties and colts nursing. Then a human mama and she totally got it. So when I came home and nursed she didn't even bat an eye!

Zoethink 08-15-2011 09:30 AM

Re: Any advice on explaining bf-ing to my 3yr old?
I loved the ideas of having a special something to do with the older child while the new baby is nursing!

There is a story my mom likes to tell about when my first brother was born (I was 2 1/4 years old so I don't remember this, but she credits this with our good sibling relationship): She nursed him, changed him and laid him on a blanket and then picked me up and we cuddled. My brother began to fuss and I told her "the baby's crying", and she said, " I know, but he is fine and this is our time to cuddle". My brother fussed some more but my mom kept assuring me that he was fine and that it was our time to cuddle. Then finally I said, "mommy, pick up the baby". So, she put me down and picked up my brother. She let it be my choice, and she really feels like this went a long way towards helping me get over my jealousy.

Good luck!

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