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-   -   Need some advice/ help to plan a last minute c-section... (http://www.diaperswappers.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1337013)

kiwikay 01-13-2012 07:13 PM

Need some advice/ help to plan a last minute c-section...
 
So I am coming to terms with the idea that my beautiful vbac I imagined to heal me from my previous emergency c-section is probably not going to happen.
I am now 5 days passed my due date and I am being sent to a OB on Tuesday to discuss options. I have been seeing my MW every couple days to see if there is anything she can do (stetch & sweep, etc.) to help things along but baby isn't even engaged, cervix high and closed. She actually said yesterday baby seemed to be higher. :banghead:

Last time I had a section it was an emergency situation where I had to be given a general because my platelet count was low and it was too risky for an epidural/spinal. Last week my levels showed that I had dropped again. I have already been told that if my platelets are under 80 000 that I will have to have a general again. ;(

Last time I didn't get to see or meet my son until he was almost 2 hours old. Dh was not allowed in the OR because I was given a general. It was terrible for both of us. I met my son for the first time in front of all of my family (ILs) and they had already been with him for 2 hours. I was the last to know that he was a boy. :( It was awful.

So this time I want to go in with at least a little bit of a plan or to know what to ask for.

I was thinking of asking why DH isn't allowed in the OR just because I am under a general, why should he not allowed to be in there?
I was also considering to ask that baby and DH be brought to recovery with me? That way when I wake up they are there? Is that even possible?

What other things can I ask for? Please help. Thanks.

katyldf 01-13-2012 07:22 PM

Re: Need some advice/ help to plan a last minute c-section...
 
I'm no help because I have not been threw this but prayers that your second goes easier than your first!

mom22boysand1girl 01-13-2012 07:31 PM

Re: Need some advice/ help to plan a last minute c-section...
 
All you can do is ask. It never hurts. If they say no at least you asked and tried. I am going in for my 4th c-section. It never gets easier.

mariamommy 01-13-2012 07:57 PM

Baby could be posterior which can be indicated by a high closed cervix with an unengaged head. Check out some techniques to get baby in a better position to engage at www.Spinningbabies.com. pelvic tilts/rocks, sleeping on left side with right leg high up and bent, a 30 second inversion to relax pelvic floor muscles and establish better balance and repositioning, all could help.

I totally know how you feel. I never went into labor on my own until my third child until 43 weeks....I was hoping for vba2c. My cervix was high, closed and baby unengaged too. I just kept saying no to a c-section and I was going to wait. The midwives and doctors freaked out of course but it was still my choice. I had a successful labor (although very long....5 days) and dilated to 10cm and pushed forever only to discover a posterior acynclitic fetal position, terrible for birthing, so I had another surgical birth. I wish I had been more proactive with fetal positioning prior to labor. That's why I mention it to you.

I am trying for vba3c in May. I just gotta keep trying, I learn a lot with each birth.

mibarra 01-13-2012 09:21 PM

I also had emergency c on my 1st. I was told the husband is not allowed because it's an emergency and they need to be able to devote all their energy to making sure you and baby are okay. I'm kinda glad I was unconscious and DH wasn't in there for DD1 b/c she wasn't breathing and they had to do CPR to keep her alive until she was intubated and rushed to the NICU.

I would do the following:
1) Discuss with DH carefully what you want to happen so he can advocate for you.

2) Ask for baby and DH to be there when you wake up. If baby is healthy I see no reason they can't do this.

3) if you don't want everyone to meet baby before you, check the option on your forms that it is not ok to release either your names/locations or the babys to anyone who calls, and let DH know you want the three of you to be alone until you get to meet your baby.

Good luck!

ggill 01-13-2012 09:42 PM

Re: Need some advice/ help to plan a last minute c-section...
 
:hugs:

I made it very clear that I was first to hold both DS (after DH) no matter how long it took. My mom was very patient. I also only had my mom and DH come to both births. With DS1 I had him brought to recovery shortly after, I think that is a very reasonable request. I even tried to nurse in recovery.

DS2 went to the NICU so noone got to hold him on day 1, but my mom was not allowed to go see him until I got to. She had to wait hours bc I got sick and fell asleep, but she waited.

I would put down rules and make them known. If someone cant respect your wishes they do not need to be there. It is about you and your new LO.

I agree with PP have DH advocate for you.

ETA- IME the 2nd C section was easier than the first.

Also OT- but with DS2 I got apple juice/apple sauce with every meal after delivering and it made things move along much better in the umm bowel dept.

Yellow Jewel 01-14-2012 12:56 PM

Re: Need some advice/ help to plan a last minute c-section...
 
It must be that all hospitals run a little differently. I agree that you need to make your wishes known. I had my first two LOs via emergency C. DH was in the OR in the 1st, but they eventually had to knock me out during the procedure. The 2nd go round DH was again in the OR and they even waited on him (he was umpiring a bball game). Anyway, I can relate to you as my platelets dropped also...drastically, but I don't know how low. I had HELLP and pre-eclampsia with the 1st 2 pregs.

All this to say, ask questions, make your voice heard and see what compromise can come to play. I think if you're awake in recovery, you should definitely get to request your baby be brought to you. Nurses are in such a hurry to bathe the babies that they don't think about the feelings of the mom (IMO).
I know its hard not getting to hold your baby after its taken out of your womb, but I've made sure my DH was with the babies each time (and they did go to the NICU). He atleast was in eye sight of them.

I feel like having c-sections we really do miss out on the whole birthing process...like cutting the cord, holding the baby, or bfing right away.

Well good luck to you and I hope you get to meet your precious baby soon and in a positive, peaceful way.

ho11yb 01-14-2012 09:56 PM

Are they thinking you would have a general this time around again? If not, then there is no reason your dh shouldn't be in the room with you. As far as birth plan, I would ask at the hospital what the normal procedures are & see how that compares to your ideal C birth. If it doesn't make your voice & opinions heard.

My second one was a pretty great experience compared to the first. In my first I also didn't see ds for several hours after birth.

This time things that made it really nice & that I appreciated.

My arms were not strapped down during the procedure.

Immediately after pulling baby out of me, the sheet was lowered & baby held up so I could see him right away. He was wiped off just a little, wrapped in a blanket, given to dh, and brought around the drape to me. I could reach up and touch him, stroke his cheek and truly have a moment between the 3 of us. Dh went with the baby to the nursery to do what they do there-footprints, official measurements, etc while I was closed up.

When I got to the recovery room, I was able to say when I wanted the baby brought to me... Which was right away.

Baby was brought before his bath and just wrapped in a blanket so we could lay skin to skin which we did for several hours.

As for family seeing or holding him before I did. I specifically told my mom that she wasn't allowed to hold him before me (unless things went horribly wrong & I was incapacitated for days). She was cool with that.

magoose 01-15-2012 07:10 AM

Re: Need some advice/ help to plan a last minute c-section...
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by kiwikay (Post 14449997)
So I am coming to terms with the idea that my beautiful vbac I imagined to heal me from my previous emergency c-section is probably not going to happen.
I am now 5 days passed my due date and I am being sent to a OB on Tuesday to discuss options. I have been seeing my MW every couple days to see if there is anything she can do (stetch & sweep, etc.) to help things along but baby isn't even engaged, cervix high and closed. She actually said yesterday baby seemed to be higher. :banghead:

Last time I had a section it was an emergency situation where I had to be given a general because my platelet count was low and it was too risky for an epidural/spinal. Last week my levels showed that I had dropped again. I have already been told that if my platelets are under 80 000 that I will have to have a general again. ;(

Last time I didn't get to see or meet my son until he was almost 2 hours old. Dh was not allowed in the OR because I was given a general. It was terrible for both of us. I met my son for the first time in front of all of my family (ILs) and they had already been with him for 2 hours. I was the last to know that he was a boy. :( It was awful.

So this time I want to go in with at least a little bit of a plan or to know what to ask for.

I was thinking of asking why DH isn't allowed in the OR just because I am under a general, why should he not allowed to be in there?
I was also considering to ask that baby and DH be brought to recovery with me? That way when I wake up they are there? Is that even possible?

What other things can I ask for? Please help. Thanks.

Wow, sounds like what happened with me. I too had a c/s under GA, so I was unconcious, intubated and DH was not in the room with me. I didn't see DS for three hours afterwards and everyone knew he was a boy but me :( No one else was in the hospital with me but DH, so he was the only one to hold DS. I had asked that no one visit me that day/night because I wanted some time just to bond with DS after such a traumatizing experience. I am opting for an elective scheduled c/s this time around, so there is more control, I'll have a spinal and I'll be awake. I just didn't want to leave anything up to chance again.

To answer some of your questions, your DH was not allowed in the room while you have a GA because you were more than likely intubated, meaning a tube was down your throat, helping you breathe. IMO, it would be pretty disturbing for your DH to see you unconcious and having help to breathe. Also, the medical staff's priority is you and your baby, not worrying about whether your DH can handle seeing you unconcious like that. They have to get the baby out fast when you're under a GA (I was told they have about three minutes) so the less distractions the better. When I had DS, he had to go to the NICU to be monitored because he was born not breathing because of the GA. They had to make sure DS was ok with no lasting effects from the anesthetic. Although it was difficult and traumatizing for me, there really is a reason why the doctors and nurses have rules in place. They're not being mean or anything, they're just trying to keep you and your baby safe and healthy. It doesn't hurt to ask for those things, but those are probably the reasons why things happened the way they did.

As for what else to ask for, if you do have another GA, ask that hte baby be brought to you as soon as possible and for no other family members to hold the baby until you do. If it was me, I wouldn't even want anyone else there again until I could hold and see my baby. I don't think it's an unreasonable request for only you and DH to be the first ones to hold your baby. Unfortunately, when that level of medical intervention is required for the safe delivery of your baby, there's not a whole lot of say in things. If you are awake for your c/s, things will be different and your DH and baby can stay with you the entire time. HTH :hugs:

kiwikay 01-15-2012 11:38 AM

Re: Need some advice/ help to plan a last minute c-section...
 
Thank you everyone for your replies! It does help to hear from others and to hear some other perspectives. It was such a rushed situation that nothing was discussed so it was overwhelming. This time if we end up in a similar situation I want to at least feel like I have some kind of control or at least understand why things are done the way they are done. DH was very good and didn't let family members hold my son before me, but everyone was there when I saw him for the first time, and it just wasn't the intimate experience of meeting the little bundle for the first time that I expected.
This time I am hoping that since we can discuss/plan we will hold off so that I can be a part of introducing baby to family too. I will find out Tuesday what level my platelets are at and whether or not if I have to have a C-section will I be given a General or epidural. Here's hoping for high numbers! :goodvibes:
I have HELPP as my bp and everything else is fine, just for some reason my platelets drop while pregnant especially near the end. :(


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