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-   -   what kind of worries do you have when it comes to your children (http://www.diaperswappers.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1370987)

fulloflove2 03-23-2012 08:49 AM

what kind of worries do you have when it comes to your children
 
I worry so much about my children. I was just wondering if IM the only one that seems to have so many worries when it comes to their kids. I am a worrier. So what do you worry about when it comes to your babys? Do they have any medical problems or other problems such as their growth or learning or plagio or developmental? Is it normal to worry about your children so much? My friend said its normal but I dont know.

EmilytheStrange 03-23-2012 09:10 AM

Yes, very normal :)

That's why being a parent is so exhausting. You're always thinking, worrying, preparing, creating, etc.

I worry about development stuff, medical stuff, future educational stuff... You name it and I've already dreamed up a scenario for it.

Mostly I worry that I'm going to miss something that should have been fixed earlier. Or that my kid will not love me because I discipline her or because I get on my phone or computer too much.

Which means I need to turn this off now :)

danielle 03-23-2012 10:26 AM

Oh yeah. We all share certain basic worries and then tweak according to our circumstances and add our own custom-made worries. And I'm not even a worrier. I'm pretty laid back because I have a tendency to see/sense things coming, but parenting unlocked my worry skills.

As a non-worrying type of parental worrier, I have decided that for the most part it's going to be ok, but that worrying about health, education and happiness will probably pay some dividends so I have my eye on these things.

Liadan23 03-23-2012 10:38 AM

Re: what kind of worries do you have when it comes to your children
 
yea i think it's totally normal. everyone worries about their kids, it's one of the hardest thing about being a parent. i'm a pretty laid back person too, i usually don't get that worked up about the "what ifs". but.....i still go in my 2 yr old's room every night to check if he's breathing. i'm terrified he'll just stop, in his sleep. i dunno why. sometimes i get up in the middle of the night and check too. dh thinks i'm crazy. anyways, that's just what i think it my personal craziest example.

i also spend a lot of time worrying about things like, am i being a good enough mother for him? teaching him the things i'm supposed to? will he be a good person because of me, or will i have screwed it up? do i spend enough time with him? when i do, is it quality time? yesterday i just sat and watch him play after work, should i have come up with some sort of activity that was educational and fun and helped his development in some way? plus all the usual ones about him getting hurt or sick. it's just part of being a mom. i don't think it ever ends. my mom says she still lays awake at night sometimes worrying about her grown children in their own homes. are we ok? are we happy? is our life what we want? we're not fighting with our spouses are we? are they good to us? that sort of thing....just part of being a mom :)

MamaJules 03-23-2012 10:59 AM

Re: what kind of worries do you have when it comes to your children
 
I think my biggest worry for my kids is what the world will be like when they are adults. There is just so much crazy stuff going on right now. Will they be able to get a job? Will they ever be able to afford a house? Will they be able to raise their children in the way they choose?

isabelsmummy 03-23-2012 11:10 AM

Re: what kind of worries do you have when it comes to your children
 
I don't worry toooo much about them per se. I have general concern for their education and well being but nothing extreme. What I spend 90% of my time worrying about is that something will happen to me and leave them without a mother. Completely and utterly freaks me out. (ovarian and breast cancer are in my family) I'm actually at the point I think I need to seek counselling for it because I just can't seem to deal with it.

iris0110 03-23-2012 11:23 AM

Re: what kind of worries do you have when it comes to your children
 
I'm a worrier by nature, I worry a lot. I worry about Kearnan because he has special needs. I worry that he will never be able to take care of himself or that he will get out on his own and people will take advantage of him. I worry that we waited too long on his diagnosis and he won't reach his full height or that his heart was effected. I worry that we will never figure out what is going on with Tharen and he will turn out mean and defiant instead of the sweet little boy I see other times. I worry that I am making mistakes with their education and they won't learn everything they need to know. I worry that I am pushing them too hard and they aren't enjoying their childhoods. I worry that the house isn't clean enough. I worry they aren't getting healthy enough food to grow. I worry that maybe I should take all dairy out of Tharen's diet, just to be safe and maybe Kearnan should be GFCF to see if it helps. I worry the kids will grow up to hate me because I'm too strict.

There are a million more, I can worry myself into a tizzy. Some of them I go over with doctors and specialists others I just let float around in my mind or talk about with dh and dismiss because it is just the normal worries of raising kids. Or who knows, maybe I am crazy.

Palooka 03-23-2012 11:25 AM

Re: what kind of worries do you have when it comes to your children
 
I'm not generally a worrier, but I do worry about my babe. At our 2 month checkup this week they said my son had put only only 10 oz in a month, compare that to 2.5 lbs his first month of life. He's EBF and has a great latch and gulps the milk down, but he's usually done in about 10 minutes. If I try to feed him again before he's ready, or try to feed him for a longer time, he just spits it all up. I've even started doing dream feedings because he will happily sleep 11 hours straight at night. We've also given him bottles and concluded he just doesn't like more than 3 oz at a time, whether from the bottle or from me.
So yeah, I'm worried I guess. He's always just been a small boy. My belly measurement didn't change at all from weeks 35 to 40, and he was 10 days overdue and still under 7 pounds. So I'm not as worried that I'm doing something wrong feeding him as that there's something else retarding his growth. In my brain I know he's probably fine and every kid is different, and my hubby and I are also tall thin people who were string-bean babies.
Anyway, I bawled when my midwife sent us for an ultrasound at 39 weeks because he didn't seem to be growing. I told my husband, "I didn't realize until just now, but I'm really attached to this kid!" That's how I still feel. When I worry it sort of surprises me how much I dread anything being wrong, I'm still sort of surprised by how much I'm attached to him. So I guess I'm glad I worry about him because it helps me realize how deeply I love him. :)

tygr2410 03-23-2012 12:10 PM

Re: what kind of worries do you have when it comes to your children
 
i let most things go..i feel i'm pretty educated or get it fast for medical issues...

my MAIN concern, is getting everyone out in a fire. Sometimes at night it's just big pregnant me here with 3 littles...i always check to make sure escape routes are clear and beds are easy to get to.

momtojande 03-23-2012 12:16 PM

Re: what kind of worries do you have when it comes to your children
 
I worry about the mental health & addiction issues they have in their family history. I worry about all the emotional pain that life can & probably will bring their way at some point. I worry that my sweet, tender-hearted daughter will get crushed by mean people. I worry that my hard-headed boy who takes everything so personally will get swallowed up by depression or anger.

I worry that I'm making life too easy on them, and that they aren't learning to cope with adversity, and I'll produce a couple more spoiled American kids who can't compete globally. I also worry that we aren't doing enough for them. I worry that I'm making all the wrong decisions for them (even though I know that if I made other decisions, I'd worry that those were wrong too). I worry that I'm not a stable, mature, together-enough person to be entrusted with raising two precious people who deserve better.

I worry about drunk drivers. I worry about how my kids will drive in 10 or 12 years. I worry about whether the country will dissolve, economically or politically or both. I worry about doomsday scenarios -- nuclear war, or any war for that matter. Natural disasters. I worry about being separated from my kids during a natural disaster -- what if a huge tornado hits while I'm at work and they're at school?

And about sickness and injury. I worry about them hurting themselves playing sports or climbing too high. I also worry that I'm too overprotective and have to let them take risks more.

Oh, I'm only getting started. Breathe, breathe. Gotta back away from this line of thinking.


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