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Brittany1287 07-20-2012 12:56 PM

How often do your babies nurse?
My DD is 7 weeks she wants to nurse every 1.5 hours and eats for 45 minutes...which means I have 45 minutes to pee and eat and take care of my toddler and sometimes that 45 is spent trying to keep her from crying... I am so close to switching to formula...DH is gone 2 weeks at a time and no help when he is here and DS1 is so naughty and getting neglected bc I am busy nursing...I can't even go anywhere cause she needs to eat by the time we get there and DS1 wont sit in the car for 45 minutes while I nurse her. She is gaining wth is going on...I really want her to have bm and the thought of not is making me depressed and DH told me how bad i am for wanting to quit and how i need to let her cry and organize my time so i can cook and clean the house..he has no idea...someone suggested pumping and feeding her bottles but i get 2 oz max a session after 20 min of pumping so i dont think that would work. I am having almost like panik attacts bc I am so stressed.

Mom2jandb 07-20-2012 01:15 PM

DD1 was like that, but I didn't have a toddler to care for so it was no big deal. Can you wear her during the 45 mins between sessions? Better yet, if you are good you can nurse in the carrier. I'm not that good...
That sucks that DH is gone so long. This too shall pass. That's what I tell myself when I feel like it is all just too much. You are a great mama for wanting to give the best to your babes. How old is DS?

Mom2jandb 07-20-2012 01:17 PM

Also, does DD cry A LOT? Could she be sensitive to something in your diet?

MN Mama to 3 07-20-2012 02:16 PM

I agree, this too shall pass.

I'd like to add you should give yourself some grace. Caring for a new baby isn't easy and more of an adjustment with other children. I would suggest finding things you can do with your DS while nursing. Puzzles and books worked for me. I would do a lot with baby sleeping in my arms some days - I agree a sling would be a great option.

Beesgirl 07-20-2012 02:30 PM

Just remember that formula won't necessarily solve any problems and it could just create more. Having a newborn and small toddler is tough, just try and remember how quickly it goes and that you will all get through. Try and reach out to friends and family for help!

mariamommy 07-20-2012 04:43 PM

everything you are describing is normal :) my 7 week old nurses that often too and my 3 older kids run circles around me when I am sitting.

And I swear...bottle feeding is harder. Both hands are tied up doing that! :P

Teexie 07-20-2012 05:59 PM

Re: How often do your babies nurse?
Hang in there mama. It will get better. You are doing a great job and giving baby exactly what she needs. My DD was the same way, although she was my first so I didn't have a toddler to care for as well. Can you try wearing her? That way she can nurse while you chase the toddler around, pee, cook (I'd stick with the microwave or sandwiches at this point!), get groceries, whatever you need to do.

As for your DH, I'd just let his comments go. It seems that men often want to solve the problem, rather than sympathize. He sees you're overwhelmed, so he tells you what he thinks is the best solution. Do what you can, when you can. You will soon be able to organize your time to get things done, but for right now, baby is the priority.

Are there any LLL meetings nearby? There are always toddlers running around at our meetings. That might allow your DS to get some play time in while you can talk with other moms who have BTDT. How old is your DS? Can you take him to a park so he can run around, while you relax on a bench and nurse DD?

Is there anyone who can help you out? Even a young neighbor or someone who can play with the toddler for an hour or two a week while you relax with baby?

NikiG 07-20-2012 06:10 PM

It was the same with my DS and it passed around 8-10 weeks. Some babies just need more boob time.
Make a box of special milk time toys that your older kiddo only gets when it's nursing time. Make it really special. And get a good sling and learn to nurse in it!
I know it seems really bad now, but hang in there mama it WILL get better.
Oh, and let your house get messy! Just do the bare minimum. Cook, dishes, laundry for a while or at least while DH is away.
Also I agree that formula won't solve anything. Figure in extra time making/cleaning bottles plus the health risks could mean more doctors visits, etc.
Good luck mama, it only lasts a little while in the grand scheme of things!!

mommabritt 07-20-2012 06:19 PM

Ah mama, take a deep breath. :hugs:

You are still into transition. It takes time to get a good rhythm going so give yourself a break. Formula won't necessarily fix the problems you describe.

Can you learn to nurse on the go? Like, in the floor while stacking blocks, coloring or reading with your toddler?

Brittany1287 07-20-2012 08:30 PM

Re: How often do your babies nurse?
she does cry alot... I already took gluten/dairy/rice out she still has bad gas. DS will be 3 in August...he is really naughty we have some behavior issues he goes to a developmental ped the end of the month. unfortunately we have no family here and really don't know anyone. And the only thing my sister and mom do is tell me I just need to go to formula and feed her cereal and that she is starving (which my dad tried telling me to). I can nurse in a sling thing i have but she gets a bad latch when in there then I get super sore, although sometimes I do it. It is way too hot to go to a park :( 107 today. And I hate nursing in public. I tried doing the bare minimum then DH flipped out on me and told me I am getting nothing done and that TONS of other women nurse and keep up with lots of kids and housework so i should too (he got this stupid idea from a guy at work that has 9 kids and his wife bf and homeschools)

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