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Done at 3 09-08-2012 11:06 AM

I am going to lose it!!!
My almost 3.5 year old son is the most resistant potty trainer ever! I seriously am at my wits end. I have tried everything I could think of and am in desperate need of advice. We have tried the leaving him bottomless route and it worked well for a few days then he started just doing his business wherever he is standing! Well I just walked in his room to find him driving trucks through piles of poo!! Why doesn't he care? It's so completely frustrating and disgusting! Please help!

MDever 09-08-2012 11:10 AM

Re: I am going to lose it!!!
Every kid is so different. I think if he is prone to accidents some washable trainers might be a good idea. I like the Carter's ones. They still feel wet but it has a waterproof layer so you won't have such a mess. Then maybe try being a pain in the tush. Tell him that every 10 minutes(use a timer) he will need to stop what he is doing and sit on the potty for a minute. Hopefully he will get sick of you bugging him and "go" by himself.

Done at 3 09-08-2012 11:21 AM

I've tried pretty much every training pant known to man :( if he has any fabric on him he will absolutely go in it. The only time I even get a chance of him using the toilet is if he is bottomless.

Yesterday we were playing and I noticed a few drops hit the floor. I took him to the bathroom and said "I see you starting to pee on the floor, you must use the toilet" he went into the shower and started to pee. I said "no, on the toilet" he then came out of the shower and started to pee on the bathroom floor! I placed him on the toilet, he reluctantly peed in the toilet after I told him he was not leaving the bathroom until he had. I then praised and rewarded. He continued to pee on the toilet for the remainder of the day.

I have been telling him constantly all day to poop in the toilet and reminding him of the positive things that would come after he did (he's ha trains taken for pooping in his pants) he would get his trains back and I was so excited to play trains with him etc... Nothing gets him :( he's a super smart kid, who is generally not defiant in any other regards. He's super easy to parent, just can't seem to climb this hurdle!

MDever 09-08-2012 11:25 AM

Re: I am going to lose it!!!
Yep, kids have very little control over their daily lives. They really can only control what/how much goes in and how it comes out. A power struggle with a kid is no joke:chuckle: they are tough cookies. Does he say he would prefer to wear diapers?

UmmKira 09-08-2012 11:26 AM

Re: I am going to lose it!!!
Have you tried having him clean up his own mess? Either cleaning up the floor, or rinsing out his pants/trainers?

HUGS!! Sounds rough right now, but you'll all get through it. :)

Done at 3 09-08-2012 11:36 AM

Yes, he said he wants to wear diapers. I have had him clean it up, as much as I could stand anyway :/ watching it get rubbed deeper into the carpet is super hard for me, I have control issues but I really try to keep It to myself. He proudly told me he pooped on his floor. It's like a joke to him. If he poops in his trainers he would gladly stay in it all day. It boggles my mind! I really try not o make it a power struggle. I tried just laying off and not making a big deal, no change.

marliah 09-08-2012 11:53 AM

Re: I am going to lose it!!!
My second son was diagnosed with autism so take this story with that in mind, but I knew he could control his peeing and pooping and tried EVERYTHING to get him to use the potty. In fact we tried so hard that my third son potty trained really early due to it lol (he was around 2.5/3 and were were going in the bathrrom every 15 minutes to try to use the potty) well I finally gave up and just put my second son in diapers, he wore them til he was 9 then one say it w like he got tired of them and just started using the toilet. (remember he is special needs, I think most children would stop way sooner than that) . So maybe just leaving it be for a while would work and he will get tired of it? I know how gross it can be, we used to find finger paintings on the walls :yuck: and toys with poop on them :yuck::yuck: so nasty!

marliah 09-08-2012 11:57 AM

Re: I am going to lose it!!!

Originally Posted by Done at 3 (Post 15655237)
He proudly told me he pooped on his floor. It's like a joke to him. .

I didn't see this before I posted my response....I would discipline for that. That's just naughty behavior.

I won't discipline for potty training mistakes but for disobedience I will and that is outright defiant behavior.

maieranne 09-08-2012 01:11 PM

Re: I am going to lose it!!!
I don't have any advice mama just a hug from someone right with you. My DD will be 4 on wednesday and still has not gone either 1 or 2 in potty. Everyone tells me they won't go to kindergarden in a diaper.....sometimes I think some kids say...."try me!" :)

Done at 3 09-10-2012 09:00 AM

Thanks for the hug :) he is peeing in the toilet more consistently in the last 2 days, now if only he'd poop we'd be in business. He does get punished for intentionally not using the toilet to poop, but even the various punishments I've tried don't seem to carry much weight with him. I really thought taking the trains each time would work because they are his most favorite toy, but nope :( he's a tough nut to crack! He's gotten time outs, loss of other privileges. I've tried everything I could think of. I try focusing on positive rewards to work towards as it seems to be more effective for him in other situations but with this he couldn't really care less about anything.

I feel badly because I haven't been as "on it" in the past few weeks because I just had DS3 and was recovering from a c section. Also it seemed a lot of advice was to expect regression with the new baby in the house. I am of the thought that once you start PL you shouldn't stop but I just couldn't do it KWIM.

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