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-   -   January 2013 Chat Thread (http://www.diaperswappers.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1476814)

FindingMercy 01-01-2013 02:32 PM

January 2013 Chat Thread
 
Happy New Year ladies!

We are excited for 2013 around here. Hopefully we will finalize soon and it will be the first year that we aren't either trying to get pregnant, trying to adopt, or having/being placed with a new baby in many years. We feel very complete!

Haleybailey 01-01-2013 02:50 PM

Re: January 2013 Chat Thread
 
A MONTH??? Thats crazy!!! What's the difference between Angels and the county? Besides only taking one child? In SD are the foster parents reaponsible for transportation to visits? Do they have any rules about bumpers? We have a whole crib set with a bumper and was wondering if we could even use it. It's super cute We have a cradle that will be in our room until they're sleeping through the night. Also planning on getting a travel swing and a booster high chair. We already have a bouncer and a PAC n play. Thank you all for answering my million questions! I am so excited!!

~*~Sunflower~*~ 01-01-2013 03:43 PM

Re: January 2013 Chat Thread
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Haleybailey (Post 16101497)
A MONTH??? Thats crazy!!! What's the difference between Angels and the county? Besides only taking one child? In SD are the foster parents reaponsible for transportation to visits? Do they have any rules about bumpers? We have a whole crib set with a bumper and was wondering if we could even use it. It's super cute We have a cradle that will be in our room until they're sleeping through the night. Also planning on getting a travel swing and a booster high chair. We already have a bouncer and a PAC n play. Thank you all for answering my million questions! I am so excited!!

Yeah, a month is definitely crazy! I think I read that they do the classes in ONE WEEK!!!

With the agency, you are definitely going to go a lot quicker than through the county. I hear it takes a LONG time with the county. Also, I have heard that the county workers sometimes will manipulate you & such. With an agency such as Angels or Koinonia, the workers dont do that. And they are available to you in a way that the county workers aren't. When we went through training with Koinonia there was actually a county social worker getting licensed to foster through them- she said that she always preferred placing kids through Koinonia instead of the county. :)

The foster family is required to transport to visitation, so be sure not to take a placement that is too far away. We made that mistake once, and the baby had NUMEROUS visitations a week, we spent more than we got from the county on gas alone while we had him!
No one ever said anything about bumpers in our classes, so its probably fine.
:)

Haleybailey 01-02-2013 12:30 AM

Re: January 2013 Chat Thread
 
I think I will call Angels tomorrow. How often are home visits? And are you allowed to schedule them around your schedule or is it a do this now kind of thing?

Haleybailey 01-02-2013 12:48 AM

Re: January 2013 Chat Thread
 
Sorry, visits, not home visits...

dalynn1997 01-02-2013 08:03 AM

Re: January 2013 Chat Thread
 
Here visitation is based on visitation centers openings and parent's needed times. If you work or have certain unavailable times be quick to tell the CW so that they can try to accommodate your schedule when finding a visitation center. The more flexible that you can be the better as it can be hard to accomidate everyone.

As a foster parent I have a love hate when it comes to visits. It can be one of the harder parts of fostering.

Also, Hailey when it comes to adoption vs. fostering make sure you are honest and clear with what you want. You can lose placements by both being under or over eager to adopt. We had IF issues too and we went in to fostering with ideas to just foster unless the right child came along. Actually that was the worst thing we could have done. We got placements that were never going to go to adoption only. So we had a lot of kids in and out and most were not good fits. Our state will only place infants with a family that has verbalized foster only if it is known to be short term. They do not want a newborn in a foster only or only if we click with child home. Only if we click with child homes are viewed a shopping for the right kid homes and high disruption rates are feared. On the flipside, here there is no such thing as a preadopt home. if you want only adoption then they wont place with you either bc they want you to be willing to work with parents and understand that you are fostering. They want newborn in homes that are adoption minded BUT willing to work the case and understand adoption may not happen if family is found or RU happens. It took me a year to figure this out. Also you may not want to share either way that you are still hoping to get pregnant some CW won't place then bc they think that you will disrupt foster hold if you get pregnant. So be sure to discuss with your DH exactly where you stand with all this and be sure to communicate it.

This is how we ended up fostering and truly how we feel. We are an adoption minded foster home. It is known that we would like to adopt but understand there are no guarantees. We would like to help as many children as possible are our journey to building our family through fostering. We are willing to work with bparents and families and support RU whenever possible. We want to adopt only the child that truly has no one else and that needs a forever family. We never take a child that we think we may need to disrupt. Because we know exactly where we stand and have communicated it to our county agency wee get placements that are good fits for our family. I can have a newborn whenever I say that I am ready.

FindingMercy 01-02-2013 11:47 AM

Re: January 2013 Chat Thread
 
Still hardly any weight gain for little man. We are scheduled for a GI scope on the 14th if we can't get it figured out before then. :(

~*~Sunflower~*~ 01-02-2013 12:00 PM

Re: January 2013 Chat Thread
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Haleybailey (Post 16103654)
I think I will call Angels tomorrow. How often are home visits? And are you allowed to schedule them around your schedule or is it a do this now kind of thing?

Visits vary a lot. With one placement we had 1-2 a week,we dropped baby off for 8 hrs. one baby had 1x week for 1 hr. another had 1x a week with mom (unsupervised day visit), 2x week for 1 hr with Dad, supervised. You have to work through your schedule & the parent's. And you have to be careful, because some parents will try to take advantage of you. Of course, you might get lucky & have no visits - you just never know! :)

~*~Sunflower~*~ 01-02-2013 12:04 PM

Re: January 2013 Chat Thread
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by FindingMercy (Post 16105131)
Still hardly any weight gain for little man. We are scheduled for a GI scope on the 14th if we can't get it figured out before then. :(

How disappointing! I hope they figure it out soon!

dalynn1997 01-02-2013 06:35 PM

Re: January 2013 Chat Thread
 
OK, I know that I am a little nuts but I am itching for a placement:-) I just keep thinking that a 2-5 year old girl would fit in nicely around her. It has been 6 mths since I got the call for NB. A little nervous about going active since we are pretty sure we will get a call for boys new sibling this Spring. Just feel like I have the space and time and could be helping another child right now not just waiting.


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