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sillymama 01-28-2013 05:43 PM

Gender Disappointment
We had our anatomy scan today and found out we are having a baby girl. We have two girls, 6 & 4, and one son who will be 2 in March. I was really, really hoping for another boy. Based on my pregnancy so far (morning sickness and baby's heart rate) I was convinced I was having another boy so it was a surprise to find out that I was not correct. I know I should be grateful to have a healthy baby (and I am!) but I am really struggling with the news. This is the first time I have dealt with this because I was really hoping for a girl first, then I was thrilled to have a sister for my DD, and thrilled again to be having a boy after two girls. The sane part of me knows these feeling will be resolved soon enough and once this baby girl joins our family I will never be able to imagine life differently. I guess I just need to get these feelings out. I am really glad that I know the gender and have a few months to adjust to everything. I feel like if I had waited to find out I would have had a hard time bonding at birth.

Holly dolly 01-28-2013 05:46 PM

(((Hugs))) I haven't personally dealt with this... But i fear it if we get pg again. It will be our last and I would love a little girl. I can only imagine the feelings...that said...I know you will love this sweet baby the moment you see her...and probably before. :)

Art mama 01-28-2013 05:50 PM

I'm sure you will get used to it but I understand. I have two girls and really don't want a boy if I have another lol. I just know if I get preggo again have one! I'd be ok with it but I'd have to adjust. Hugs!

leyash 01-28-2013 05:51 PM

Re: Gender Disappointment
I feel your pain. We have three boys. This is our last baby. I won't be having anymore. It's another boy. We wanted a girl SO badly, and were even told it was a girl at our 17 week ultrasound. Unfortunately, the tech was wrong. He is very much a boy as we found out at our 20 week anatomy scan.

I haven't bought anything. Nothing. I love this boy with all of my heart. Feeling his little kicks makes me giggle. I talk to my stomach often, and really, really, really love this baby. I just can't seem to get excited like I was with the other three. I am like you, I know these feelings will go away when (if not before) he is born... and it will be like he was just supposed to be here... but I can't help wonder what my life would be like with a little pink in it.

MsGiggles 01-28-2013 06:17 PM

Re: Gender Disappointment
:hugs: sorry, mama. i, too, dread that gender disappointment.

(also, congrats on the healthy pg/babe)

cuddlebunny_24 01-28-2013 06:35 PM

Re: Gender Disappointment
I know the feeling, we were hoping for a girl this time around, but we are getting another boy. That will bring us up to three boys. However, the up side to this is that I do not have to go buy new baby clothes or anything like that I have pretty much everything I will need for another baby because we saved everything from the two older boys.

mibarra 01-28-2013 06:49 PM

I am pregnant with girl #3. We are probably done. I was devastated. I was sure it was a boy. I've always wanted both, all my friends got both. I literally cried the whole way home from the ultrasound. Of course, I'm grateful for a healthy baby. Now about 10 weeks later I'm more at peace with it, but I think a tiny part of me will hold out hope they were wrong until I see for myself at delivery .

TinyHineyDiapers 01-28-2013 06:52 PM

I'm with you mamas. When I found out #2 was another boy, I cried. Luckily the u/s tech thought they were tears of joy, otherwise I would have cried twice as much out of embarrassment! Now I'm really glad I have 2 boys, but I want a dd so bad, and i'm scared to try again and end up with another ds.

homebirthmom 01-28-2013 07:06 PM

Re: Gender Disappointment
i had that with my 4th child. I really wanted a girl vs a boy and I was utterly depressed over it. (just being honest) it took me about 6 months AFTER his birth to completely fall in love. it was not easy, i found out what he was by accident and i wished I had just seen at birth... I think thats the issue w alot of gender disappointment. if you dont find out at 17-20 weeks, you will fall in love with whats kicking in your and the surprise at birth.
I did not find out what I was having w number 5 and I had to come to terms that I may be having a boy. I was forced to do that for 9 months. I did end up getting another girl on #5 and I honestly think it would have only stung a tad if it were a boy.

talk it thru. do whatever you can to heal and process it BY delivery. dont go into postpartum like me. far too many crying nights. it was senseless.

gingerpeachee 01-28-2013 07:07 PM

Re: Gender Disappointment
My heart sunk when I found out #3 was another boy. Part of me was so ready to be done having children, but I know I won't be able to resist trying at least once more for a baby girl. I'm already anxious about "what if I have another boy after this?!?!?!" It took about 2 weeks but I'm really very excited about Henry (boy #3). My grandma said to me, "You're so lucky, not just anyone gets to have 3 boys and your boys are going to have 2 brothers each!"

So in the spirit of my wise old grandma and thinking about your DS; Not just any little boy gets to have 3 sisters.

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