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-   -   Disappointed with our Ped. :/ Vent - pls help me work through this. (http://www.diaperswappers.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1516676)

Kiliki 05-13-2013 11:06 AM

Disappointed with our Ped. :/ Vent - pls help me work through this.
 
We've had the same ped now for over 4 yrs.

We don't vax.

We don't do well-baby visits.

It's never, ever been a problem.

Then, they got a new nurse a few months ago. She's SUUUUUUUPER snotty. She looks all of 17. I met her when I took my 2 mo old in for his 48 hr check up. But I figured maybe I was just hormonal and misread her tone or something. There is only one nurse.

So, today, I took my 2 month old in b/c he sounds wheezy. I wasn't concerned. He has no fever, he's eating/pooping/peeing normally, and is alert and normal acting. But, my mom, dad, and a family friend all expressed concern over how he sounded, so I took him in to get checked out. I had my YDD checked too since she's been snotty. I really wanted her to get her physical, actually, but they won't do a physical exam on the same day as a sick visit...:banghead:

Anyhow, we get there, and we get called back to the nurse to do the typical checks before we get put in the doc room.

She does the weight checks for YDD and YDS. Then tells me that YDD needs her 2 year physical. I already knew that and wanted them to do it today, but they told me over the phone they won't do it... So I just said, "Ok. :)"

Then, she says, "And your son.... Oh my... He never had his 1 month well visit!!? Um, he needs to be coming to well visits. He's TWO MONTHS old now. He's due for his 2 month exam.... You need to schedule that, too."

I said, "Well, we don't do the vaccines, so..."

She says, "That really doesn't matter. You still need to be bringing them in for their well visits. I don't know who was here before me that told you that it's okay to miss well visits. But it's NOT okay. You need to be bringing them in at least to check their weight/height. It doesn't matter if you do vaccines or not."

...and she turns around and leaves the room....

The doc comes in. Kids just have colds (which is EXACTLY what I thought... what a colossal waste of my time), they're fine. Suction their noses, use saline, they'll improve in time. Then at the end of all that, he hurriedly says, "Also, it's important to be bringing them back every 2 months or so for well visits. I know you don't do vaccines. But we need to be checking their weight and height to make sure they are growing."

And then he leaves.

I am pretty frustrated. It's REALLY REALLY hard to find a ped that sees unvaxed kids here. So, now, with Miss Snot Face nurse, I feel like I can either risk getting more flack from her, (or maybe she'll call CPS on me - she seems like that type of person) or I can try to find a new ped.

I really really REALLY think it's stupid to bring 4 healthy kids to a doctor so they can give me the height and weight of my youngest kid. I can check his height and weight at home. It's just a huge waste of my time.

***I really don't want to debate the value of well checks.****

How can I fix this? I really prefer not to switch peds, but I don't want any more confrontation. (I don't do well with confrontation) And there is no other nurse to check in with. It's Miss Snot Face only. I miss the old nurse, she was awsome with the kids and so personable. This new one is cold, aloof, and rude. :gah:

danielle 05-13-2013 11:12 AM

Re: Disappointed with our Ped. :/ Vent - pls help me work through this.
 
Maybe do a bit of detective work and find out where the previous nurse went? I get you mama. I personally do well checks, but I understand wanting to do things that are right for your family and having outside people try to interfere. Very annoying. Sorry.

qsefthuko 05-13-2013 11:18 AM

Re: Disappointed with our Ped. :/ Vent - pls help me work through this.
 
Right a letter to the doctor. It may or may not help. It can't hurt to try though. My doctor's nurse is similarly snotty, but about vaccines as we do now do well checks. Usually she keeps it in check though so we just deal with it on the occasion it pops up.

Kiliki 05-13-2013 11:20 AM

Re: Disappointed with our Ped. :/ Vent - pls help me work through this.
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by danner (Post 16589692)
Maybe do a bit of detective work and find out where the previous nurse went? I get you mama. I personally do well checks, but I understand wanting to do things that are right for your family and having outside people try to interfere. Very annoying. Sorry.

Thanks. I am not sure that will help though, b/c even if I find her, it's very likely the new ped she's with won't take unvaxed kids. Most here won't take unvaxed kids at all. This is the only doc I know of that does, and we drive an hour to get to him.

pinktoes 05-13-2013 11:24 AM

Fresh out of school professionals are often very by-the-book. She doesn't know you yet or how you do things, or your rationale for not doing well baby checks.
If all she knows is u don't do them because u don't vax, she may think you genuinely don't know the importance.she also may have a insurance billing box to check off that she educated you on the importance of well baby checks d/t noncompliance w the visits.
It's fine for people to choose to go against medical advice but medical professionals are required to document that you were educated on risks benefits.

I don't think you have to change peds.
Next time just tell her you know are aware of the risks. Once she knows you then I'm sure it will be a non issue.

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UVASahm 05-13-2013 11:26 AM

Re: Disappointed with our Ped. :/ Vent - pls help me work through this.
 
What are they going to do if you don't bring in for well visits? Probably nothing so I would just smile and say thank you and walk out. I personally think well visits are a colossal waste of time if you don't do vaccines so I'm right there with you.

Kiliki 05-13-2013 11:32 AM

Re: Disappointed with our Ped. :/ Vent - pls help me work through this.
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by UVASahm (Post 16589729)
What are they going to do if you don't bring in for well visits? Probably nothing so I would just smile and say thank you and walk out. I personally think well visits are a colossal waste of time if you don't do vaccines so I'm right there with you.

I thought about that, too.

I just hate confrontation. :blush: Like, a LOT. I wish I had a backbone.

She was pretty nasty about it. And I don't know what to do if she gets meaner the next time I go in. How do I politely say "Thanks, BUT ... If they're sick,I will bring them. I don't bring healthy kids to the doctor." I don't know how to communicate that without seeming like a huge jerk myself. KWIM?

sojomisa 05-13-2013 11:37 AM

Re: Disappointed with our Ped. :/ Vent - pls help me work through this.
 
I would smile and nod then do what you've always done.

l_Kimmie_l 05-13-2013 11:43 AM

Re: Disappointed with our Ped. :/ Vent - pls help me work through this.
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Kiliki (Post 16589748)
I thought about that, too.

I just hate confrontation. :blush: Like, a LOT. I wish I had a backbone.

She was pretty nasty about it. And I don't know what to do if she gets meaner the next time I go in. How do I politely say "Thanks, BUT ... If they're sick,I will bring them. I don't bring healthy kids to the doctor." I don't know how to communicate that without seeming like a huge jerk myself. KWIM?

I would just say exacly that. We don't bring healthy kids to the Dr. I have 4 as well. It is crazy to round up 4 kids 4 times per year (more as I have a 13 month old) when we do not do vaxes till after 2. I actuall make double appointments for my over 2 yr olds just for vaxes when I feel like it rather than well checks. That way they are on the same schedule that I want.

expaik 05-13-2013 11:43 AM

Re: Disappointed with our Ped. :/ Vent - pls help me work through this.
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Kiliki (Post 16589748)
I just hate confrontation. :blush: Like, a LOT. I wish I had a backbone.

I'm shocked at this. I don't get that impression from you here on DS at all. Kind of the opposite actually. :giggle:


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