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haydn'smommy 04-21-2008 02:45 PM

Toddler nursing
 
My ds and I are down to 2 nursing sessions per day now, when he wakes in the a.m. and at night (only on days I'm home when he goes to bed). Now, suddenly he has decided that he needs to nurse in the afternoons when I'm home as well. It wouldn't be a big problem except that he's become very, very demanding about it and is pulling up my shirt, screaming and pinching me when I don't let him at them fast enough. My supply is down and there's just not much there but he doesn't seem to care to much. The other problem is that I intended to stop nursing next mo when dh and I go out of town for a week for vacation and ds isn't going with us. I figured I'd just wean him the rest of the way no problem cause he hasn't seemed real interested in it until the past few days.
Now, I do not want to take a pump with me on vacation. What are the chances I'll still have milk at all if he doesn't nurse for 1 entire week? Also, how do I stop this screaming and pinching thing? He's hurting me and I want him to stop.

Shawna 04-21-2008 03:00 PM

Re: Toddler nursing
 
How old is he...??? I ended up nursing dd until she was about 3 1/2 and the last year was mostly just when she fell asleep. I told her that we were done nursing and let her cry it out a few nights when she wanted to nurse. After a week she stopped trying to nurse anymore. She was old enough to understand that we weren't going to do it anymore. My dh was deployed and was going to be home in a few months for r&r and I still didn't want to be nursing... actually I never planned to nurse that long to start with but she had other ideas. Just tell him no and put him down if he starts pinching. If he is old enough to understand just stop all together now... I'm sure he will cry but just don't give in and they will stop.

nathansmama 04-21-2008 03:09 PM

Re: Toddler nursing
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Shawna (Post 3383343)
How old is he...??? I ended up nursing dd until she was about 3 1/2 and the last year was mostly just when she fell asleep. I told her that we were done nursing and let her cry it out a few nights when she wanted to nurse. After a week she stopped trying to nurse anymore. She was old enough to understand that we weren't going to do it anymore. My dh was deployed and was going to be home in a few months for r&r and I still didn't want to be nursing... actually I never planned to nurse that long to start with but she had other ideas. Just tell him no and put him down if he starts pinching. If he is old enough to understand just stop all together now... I'm sure he will cry but just don't give in and they will stop.

Eek...I wouldn't let him cry it out at all. Bad for baby. :(

OP- How old is your child?

haydn'smommy 04-21-2008 03:10 PM

Re: Toddler nursing
 
He's almost 14mos. I never thought this would be a problem. I EP'd for 3mos until I finally got him on the breast. When I finally did, he'd only do it 2-4 times/day and still seemed to prefer the bottle to breast most of the time. At 10mos, he slowed down on the morning feeds and cut out all the others. Now, since he turned 12 mos he has picked the evening feeding back up. I've still been pumping all this time and have only recently cut back to 2 times a day on the pumping. I have also been on dom for 1yr and I'm ready to stop that.
I am at a loss to explain the new desperation that he is showing for nursing. He has never been this interested before. I planned this vacation when he was showing little interest and now we're $4000 in the hole for it and it's not refundable. We're going. I just really don't want to keep pumping and taking dom.
I just never thought we'd be in this situation. I had resigned myself to not nursing when he came back to breast, and then I resigned myself to not extended bfing when he seemed so disinterested. Now here I am and I am torn. Mommy guilt sucks.

nathansmama 04-21-2008 03:18 PM

Re: Toddler nursing
 
Hmmm...well, I can't advocate weaning. 14 months ,in my mind, isn't a toddler but a baby still. But I do wish you the best of luck. :)

I guess, if you don't want to pump then don't pump. But I am curious what you will be giving him for the week that you are gone. Will you be starting some sort of formula or cow's milk?

And why are you pumping now? Does he not take the breast or do you work away from home?

I don't really know what else to say. Sorry!

haydn'smommy 04-21-2008 03:30 PM

Re: Toddler nursing
 
I work...alot. Plus I've had so many supply issues. I suppose I sort of have separation anxiety from my pump :blush: I pump to maintain what little supply I have. I have frozen breastmilk that he can have while I'm out of town, but he loves soy milk and rice milk and will take either of those without problem. I do send him pumped breastmilk to daycare for his lunch time beverage now, and he takes it from a cup well.
I'm just very torn. At this point I'm almost allowing myself to think about taking the pump on vacay. I just hate to see all that milk go to waste, cause I know they won't let me take it through customs and security at the airport. *sigh*

nathansmama 04-21-2008 04:15 PM

Re: Toddler nursing
 
Sorry that you are torn mama.

I can only tell you what I would do.

Since you are only nursing twice a day. I would take the pump with you on vacation. Pump twice a day and be done with it. I am saying this for two reasons, 1) to keep up your supply and 2) Even though you are only nursing twice a day, you could become very engorged while away, this can lead to pain and mastitis. OUCH! And that won't make for a good vacation. I think that breastmilk is allowed across borders. Call the airline ahead of time and ask what you need to do to follow regulations.

I would stop taking the dom and stop pumping (except on your trip). You have given your son a great gift by nursing him this long with all of the problems that you have. I would however, keep nursing him when you are with him. He can get food and other milks at daycare. If your supply tanks, take heart in the fact that you have done a great job. Most likely he will wean when there is no milk. Let it be his choice. Much gentler and easier on everyone involved.

Hope this made sense!! Kinda rambling....

I wish you the best of luck!

haydn'smommy 04-21-2008 04:35 PM

Re: Toddler nursing
 
It makes perfect sense. I'm in love with nursing him (not so fond of the new screaming and pinching) and I hate to stop, but I'm not in love with pumping and I'm over the dom. I feel so very, very lucky to be able to nurse him after all the problems we had at first, and I'd keep going as long as he wants. I just didn't prepare myself mentally for him wanting it. I'm going to stop pumping and taking the dom as planned May 1 and see what happens. If he stops before vacation, then so be it. If not, I guess the pump will be travelling with me.

napua 04-21-2008 05:57 PM

Re: Toddler nursing
 
Just wanted to offer a hug. :hugs: My DS went through a time that he was extremely demanding with nursing...pulling on me, grabbing my shirt, screaming and so on...it sucked, but we made it through it. He is now 23 months old and still nurses a lot. Good luck mama, you are doing a great job with your little one.

jennylou 04-21-2008 06:04 PM

Re: Toddler nursing
 
I'd take the pump to avoid any clogged ducts.


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