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-   -   "If she'd just talk to her, she would start talking!" gmil and mil rant (http://www.diaperswappers.com/forum/showthread.php?t=66408)

mommyto3girls 11-25-2006 09:53 PM

"If she'd just talk to her, she would start talking!" gmil and mil rant
 
Sage is 18 months and has some speach issues, we are going in for an evaluation in 2 weeks through Help me Grow.

So mil and gmil were here yesterday. I was getting supper ready and Sage was grunting and pointing at everyone trying to get her point across. From the livingroom I hear gmil say to mil "If Julie would just talk to her she'd be speaking." mil replies "well, she's so busy with work and having Maia also."

WTF do they think I don't speak to my own child? I'm going to take 2 days off of work for her hearing exam and the speech evaluation, but I won't take the time to talk ot her? I swear, they think I am a complete idiot.:banghead:

urchin_grey 11-25-2006 10:10 PM

Re: "If she'd just talk to her, she would start talking!" gmil and mil rant
 
:hugs:

I get the same kind of stuff from my (ex)ILs... and considering the "horror stories" I've heard from DS's dad, I won't be taking any of their advice any time soon. :giggle:

I guess I don't have any advice really, but is she signing? (I thought that could have been where your gmil's comment came from in the first place. :mrgreen: ) DS has a condition in which most people are never verbal, so we've been doing it and its working out well. He's 18m too and they learn signs really fast at this age. :thumbsup:

Anyway... sorry you're having to put up with rude comments, especially from family. I know that if anyone wants to get to ya, they "best" way to do it is to make negative comments about your kids. :hugs:

bsydprmkn 11-25-2006 10:19 PM

Re: "If she'd just talk to her, she would start talking!" gmil and mil rant
 
every single child learns at their own pace. since dad may have started talking at 11 months and mom at 11 months, does not guarantee the child will talk at 11 months too. i was an early speaker, dh was a normal speaker, yet my 3yr old has the vocabulary of 50 words. i had to put up with the il's and even my own parents because she wasnt talking. i knew she had problems, but they insisted it was because i wasnt doing enough and that she would be fine if i worked with her more. the only one who took my side was dh, because he knew i was working with her for hours every single day. since then she has been getting early childhood services because she cannot comprehend what we are saying to her. her hearing is fine, her sight is fine. her brain is not comprehending what we are saying to her at all.

you are her mother, you know what is best for her. please dont let other family members get to you. im here if you want to talk.

tessa1002 11-25-2006 10:23 PM

Re: "If she'd just talk to her, she would start talking!" gmil and mil rant
 
People can be so ignorant. When DS was first born DH's aunt and his cousin said we would never be able to raise him and they would have to "take him". I was furious. Guess where his cousin is now? She just got out of jail for possession of drugs and being an accomplice to a robbery. His aunt allows her son to cook meth in the basement. (She was even doing it herself for a while there) Somtimes people just need to take a step back and stop being so self righteous. In-laws can be the worst, though I'm not sure why. I don't think they even understand how hurtful their comments can be. Sorry you had to hear that though mama, I know how frusterating it is. Just ignore them, you know you're going a great job. :hugs:

mommyto3girls 11-25-2006 11:37 PM

Re: "If she'd just talk to her, she would start talking!" gmil and mil rant
 
Thanks, his grandma is 94 so I know I need to cut her some slack, heck she still refers to Sage as he and him most of the time. But his mom makes comments all the time "You need to wean at 6 weeks, I fed Billy cereal at 2 weeks and he's fine, Billy slept on his belly on a quilt and he didn't die, etc" It is just frustrating.

We do sign with her. I started around 8-9 months, just like with Maia, She signed back for the first time at just over 14 months. She signs more, please, and milkie, I saw All Done for the first time today. The ones that get her things are obviously the most motivating. We sign dirty (for diaper change) thank you, help, bath, no, stop, drink, eat, book, hurt, and sorry. I think she understands them all but she doesn't sign them back. Her comprehension seems to be pretty good, it has picked up in the last 2 months. Other than hi, mama and dada everything else is unintelligible to anyone else. I can understand "this" and "day do" is thank you. It is so hard though because she gets so angry about it and is starting to throw lots of temper tantrums because we don't know what she wants.

Thanks for listening

janendragon 11-25-2006 11:49 PM

Re: "If she'd just talk to her, she would start talking!" gmil and mil rant
 
I didnt speak early....I was a grunter and pointer for a long time......because I didnt need to speak! :giggle: I had my older brother wrapped around my little finger, i stood somewhere pointed and cryed, he came running and got it for me.

one of my first full sentances was when I fell crossing the street with my parents at around 2 1.5yrs old.......it was "oh s@#t!", my grandfather used to say it repeatedly to me as a baby to see if i would learn it........well I did :laugh:

jenmcfar 11-25-2006 11:50 PM

Re: "If she'd just talk to her, she would start talking!" gmil and mil rant
 
I had a horrid MIL and GMIL like that once (no longer married to that guy so They're not in the picture anymore, but anyhow...) and my second child didn't speak as soon or as brilliantly as my first son so MIL made a crack once about how I shouldn't have had my second child so soon after my first (they are 22 mos apart) because I obviously didn't make time/have time with him like I had my oldest or he'd be talking better. I was so mad!:gonnagetit: I told her to not forget that Einstein didn't talk until he was 4 and look how he turned out!:razz:

triscuitsmom 11-26-2006 12:26 AM

Re: "If she'd just talk to her, she would start talking!" gmil and mil rant
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by romans_mum (Post 478519)
I didnt speak early....I was a grunter and pointer for a long time......because I didnt need to speak! :giggle: I had my older brother wrapped around my little finger, i stood somewhere pointed and cryed, he came running and got it for me.

This was my brother too. My first day of kindergarten my Mom came to pick him up from the babysitter and she said "WOW... did you know he could talk?" My Mom laughed because she'd had him alone before. He had no need to talk when I was around though... I did it all for him.

To the OP: She's your daughter and you are doing what's right by her. Don't listen to them Mama, you're doing great! I hope that everything goes well when you take her for her evaluation.

png_lovebirds 11-26-2006 05:57 AM

Re: "If she'd just talk to her, she would start talking!" gmil and mil rant
 
She sounds exactly like my DS at that age! He is 21 months old now and has started to pick up a lot of new words! Just this week he learned to say No, yes, Bye, Bye Bye, and Hi and last week he learned Ball. But he has yet to say Mamma!
I don't want this to sound rude...b/c that's not my intention. But she sounds like a normal 18mth old, is their another reason you are bringing her to the Dr.?

mommyto3girls 11-26-2006 07:31 AM

Re: "If she'd just talk to her, she would start talking!" gmil and mil rant
 
She was 2 months early and has been on the very late to past the end mark for most developmental points. I would prefer to have the full evaluation to be sure we are doing all that we can for her. She has also had 3 ear infections in a 3 month span so I wanted her hearing checked. Also, Early Intervention does not count mama and dada as words even when they are used correctly. SO counting the 2 words I can understand but others can not she only has three counted words hi, this, and thank you, and now 4 signs also. I would prefer to have her screened now so that if there are concerns we can deal with them now rather than to find out in 6 months.


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