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-   -   Help 3 YO with adjusting new baby in house. (http://www.diaperswappers.com/forum/showthread.php?t=686122)

Jeanie 03-03-2009 11:48 AM

Help 3 YO with adjusting new baby in house.
 
DD was very excited throughout the pregnancy. She wanted to be a big sister. Now baby is home, I dont' have much time for her. Now she gets very emotional and says I don't love her anymore, and she wants her sister to go back to my belly. I try my best to explain things to her but I can feel her pain. How do I ease that? She loves her sister but tries to touch her and twist her all the time. Which in turn make us discipline her. Any suggestions?

mamatoblessings 03-03-2009 04:11 PM

Re: Help 3 YO with adjusting new baby in house.
 
The best advice I can give you is to try to involve her in caring for the baby the best that you can...have her get dipes, wipes, put lotion on the baby and then praise her for being such a good big sister. This way you're still doing everything you need to do for the baby, but she isn't feeling left out. When you're feeding the baby is a great time for her to bring you a book and sit next to you to have reading time. It's difficult to do all these things because we all know it's easier to do it w/out little hands "helping", but ut will help her to feel more involved and not so left out. As far as her "touching and twisting", that's just a 3 year old for you, probably why God made babies so resiliant :giggle:. Instead of disciplining her (unless she is actually TRYING to hurt the baby) with my older kiddos I would show them the correct way to touch the baby if they were being too rough, show her where it is okay to touch the baby...her arms, legs, belly and tell her where it's not okay, her face, eyes ect. I know this is probably all stuff you've done, it just takes a lot of repitition for LO her age. Also, if you don't have one already, she might like a baby to take care of like you! Then when you are doing something with your baby, she can do the same with hers. HTH and hang in there mama...it will get easier!! :hugs:

rnbowbyte 03-03-2009 07:33 PM

Re: Help 3 YO with adjusting new baby in house.
 
Make sure that being bigger has some new rights/priveledges, not just responsibilities. my dd was 3 when we brought home ds and we gave her a shelf in one of the lower kitchen cabinets and stocked it with art supplies that she could get out and use all by herself (washable markers, crayons, construction paper, glue stick etc.) we also stocked the cabinet with a variety of all-by-myself style snacks like granola bars,crackers, fruit snacks, and juice boxes. She still needs permission to get into the snacks, but it made everyones life a little simpler if she could get a nutritious snack for herself if i was busy nursing the baby and it really helped her to feel that much more independant and appreciative of her "big kid" status. We also installed a lowered light switch in our bathroom and made sure that she'd be able to reach everything that she needed in there (shes 4 now and only 37 inches tall, so we still ahve to be mindfull of making sure she as access if we want to foster her independance). we made a point of pointing out things that big kids can do but babies can't "wow, you can pick out your outfit all by yourself and put it on!! baby brother cant do that can he? he has to wear whatever we pick out for him until he's bigger"

we also made sure that she got some special time with daddy during those early weeks when i was super busy with the new baby, they went to the movies and the park and we made sure that even mundane things got labeled as important, if they went to the grocery store it was "we need to make sure that mom has nutritious things to eat so that her milk can grow the baby big and strong" he made hr feel like they were partners in helping to take care of me and the baby.

i hope that might help, please pardon the bad typing, i'm nak


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