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-   -   Does anyone do cry it out? (http://www.diaperswappers.com/forum/showthread.php?t=71793)

NewMommy2006 12-09-2006 09:04 PM

Does anyone do cry it out?
 
I know the reasons not to... I'm just wondering. I've recently started letting my DS (9 months on the 25th) cry it out because he will not sleep unless he's rocked to complete sleep for every nap and bedtime. He wakes up and cries as soon as you put him down.

The low-down : DS is a serious velcro baby and to save my sanity, I started letting him cry it out. It usually takes between 15 and 30 min for him to go to sleep. He is not the kind of baby that can just go to sleep, he has to be rocked and will wake as soon as you put him down. I feel like a horrible mom and we're having to do cry it out 4-6 times a night now that he has started waking up again (we feed him and change him, rock him and then put him back in his crib). It sucks. I don't know what else to do... I simply cannot continue to attachment parent in the sense of him being glued to my hip every waking moment. He is overly clingy and being a SAHM with a DH who works 60 hours a week and I just can't keep doing this, having him be so attached.

I'm just wondering if I am the only mother who lets their baby cry it out when they know that the baby is fed, dry and overall is just tired and needs to go to sleep.

Please hold the fireballs... :)

Thanks!

keikiko 12-09-2006 09:09 PM

Re: Does anyone do cry it out?
 
We did CIO w/ DD and she is like me fiercy independent so it was totally okay. At first it took 15-30 minutes of me patting her back to get her to sleep and eventually 10 and then she was curled in a ball and ready to sleep right away. She's 2 now and had a bit of trouble when we had DS but usually she's sleeps 12-14 hours no problem. She doesn't nap though and hasn't since she was 12 months. It's just how she is believe me I've tried to get her to take naps!

My opinion of parenting is "to each his own". Do what works for you and your baby. :thumbsup:

blissfullyblessed 12-09-2006 09:59 PM

Re: Does anyone do cry it out?
 
I guess what we decided to do was a type of CIO.

I read the no cry sleep solution, and then good night, sleep tight. Well, the 2nd books recomendations were much better/realistic IMO. Rather than leave the child by themself to CIO you sit next to their bed for 10 mins saying shhhhh mommy's here, or whatever - then leave. If they're still crying after 10 mins you go back in, and sit there for a bit and then leave - extending the time your gone by 5 mins everytime. It's been a while since I read the book, but I think that's the way it goes :headscratch: . You could google sleep lady, and there's info. on the book. If I remember correctly every other night you move your chair closer to the door - until finally your outside the door. You and your DH take turns each night. I would do it during the week, and DH did it on the weekends. We also got this monitor thing that has a camera on it so we could watch her - I felt like if I could see her crying I felt better about leaving her.

Eventually, it got better! I was seriously not getting any sleep at all from waking up 8-12 times a night with DD. I really thought I was going to loose it! I was a crazy women - really loosin it!!!! Now, she sleeps from about 8:30-8 in the morning...yay!!

I promise this is a season, and it really does get better. As the other post said you have to do what works for you and your family. Ya know that old saying "if momma ain't happy - nobody's happy" - well that's true! If your not getting what you need in rest then you can't be the mommy you need to be :).

dirtdartwife 12-09-2006 10:07 PM

Re: Does anyone do cry it out?
 
yep... I've allowed all my kiddos to CIO at one point or another. If all their needs are met, and it's time for them to go to sleep, then they need to learn sometime how to get themselves to sleep. I can honestly say I've never had any of my kiddos go past 10 minutes and even after the first 5, it delves into more of a resigned whine.

It worked for us, but we've also got pretty compliant kids when it comes to sleep. My oldest will just go to bed if she's tired, my middle will curl up in a ball on the couch and go to sleep if she's tired and the toddler will tell me she wants to go to bed.

Do what works for you mama! :hugs: :hugs:

GoddessWifeMom 12-09-2006 10:13 PM

Re: Does anyone do cry it out?
 
We did and do CIO with DD.

It was extremely hard at first for me because I am I guess an attachment parent but I just couldn't take her being totally attached to me every moment of her life for the first 6 months. After 6 mns I was soooo tired and DH was we just HAD to try it.

We tried the gradual thing with CIO for 10 mins first night then get them, 15 next etc. It kind of worked but not really so we realized we just had to go cold turkey.

After the first 2 nights then there was only crying for about 2 mins or so.

It felt sooo good when she finally slept somewhere other than either DH or my arms. :laugh: And when she slept through the night once we did that we knew we had done what was best for her.

Now she occasionally cries when we put her down but it's only when we miss her tired cues or keep her up and she is overtired. When that happens we feel bad because we know it's our fault and if we had put her down earlier she would have gone without crying.

But it still feels awesome when you get it totally right and you put her in her crib and she rolls over with her blanket and bear and just goes to sleep. ;)

It gets easier and you really just have to do what is best for you and your family.

You can always try CIO like you are and if it doesn't work after a little while then stop. No harm no foul. :)

tessa1002 12-09-2006 10:20 PM

Re: Does anyone do cry it out?
 
We did CIO, and I swear it saved my life. :laugh: Really though, the only way he would sleep is if he was attatched to my boob all night, and my boobs are so small that meant I couldn't move at all during the night! :blush: The fact that we only slept on a 20 year old mattress on the floor didn't help matters either, because I would get killer cramps in my legs, and HAD to move. So at the end of the whole thing neither one of us was sleeping well, and I had to do something. The first night was bad, really bad. He kept standing up so he just wouldn't go to sleep. The next day I had the idea to swaddle him (never thought I would be swaddling a 9m old!), and he fell asleep within 15 min. It was all downhill from there. I think I stopped the swaddling around a week later. And eventually I started letting him fall asleep in my arms again, and he won't wake up when I put him down or throughout the night or anything. He sleeps anywhere from 10-12 hours, and I get my sleep too. :thumbsup:

Like all the pp said, its most important that you do whats right for you and your family! And only you know what that is. :thumbsup:

GoddessWifeMom 12-09-2006 10:27 PM

Re: Does anyone do cry it out?
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by tessa1002 (Post 521343)
We did CIO, and I swear it saved my life. :laugh: Really though, the only way he would sleep is if he was attatched to my boob all night, and my boobs are so small that meant I couldn't move at all during the night! :blush: The fact that we only slept on a 20 year old mattress on the floor didn't help matters either, because I would get killer cramps in my legs, and HAD to move. So at the end of the whole thing neither one of us was sleeping well, and I had to do something. The first night was bad, really bad. He kept standing up so he just wouldn't go to sleep. The next day I had the idea to swaddle him (never thought I would be swaddling a 9m old!), and he fell asleep within 15 min. It was all downhill from there. I think I stopped the swaddling around a week later. And eventually I started letting him fall asleep in my arms again, and he won't wake up when I put him down or throughout the night or anything. He sleeps anywhere from 10-12 hours, and I get my sleep too. :thumbsup:

Like all the pp said, its most important that you do whats right for you and your family! And only you know what that is. :thumbsup:


This sound EXACTALLY like me, boobs and all. :laugh:

I swear DH and DD had 95% of the mattress and I had 5%. I slept on a sliver and was all crampy. Then add that DD was on the boob constant from birth to 6 months, seriously I'm not exaggerating that much :cry:, the days weren't much better.

I can't believe I am back to the same situation now with DS. Back to my 5% of the mattress. :cry:

Mommy2JJ 12-09-2006 10:32 PM

Re: Does anyone do cry it out?
 
We have never done it.....I just can't personally. My ds is 17 months and still nurses to sleep.....we are beginning a gradual process to get him to go to sleep without nursing.....we will get there eventually...I hope :giggle: .

The ONE time my SIL and MIL watched him, when we were planning my fathers funeral, they let him CIO in his crib (we cosleep) and was sure to tell me too......grrrrrr now he is seriously afraid of his crib. But being a cosleeping family I think it's different then if he slept in a crib, kwim??

Getz 12-09-2006 10:43 PM

Re: Does anyone do cry it out?
 
I am having the same issues w/ my 10 mo old! And they aren't really his issues, I got him in the habit!

Lately, I would love for him to nap by himself in his crib. I have tried CIO but after 15 minutes I know he won't fall asleep and I feel like I am punishing him for a habit I created. I plan on working w/ him to get him to sleep on his own and if it involves a little CIO then I think it will be ok. You kinda know when they are going to go to sleep and when they won't.

mistylaureena 12-10-2006 01:33 AM

Re: Does anyone do cry it out?
 
Well I guess you could say we did too...and it defitnely saved my sanity but there were times when I felt bad about it....

Mikey was a hard baby who when we brought him home he screamed alot and at 7PM every night became his "witching hour" and hed cry and cry whether I was holding him or rocking him or putting him in his crib. SO I went out and bough those baby monitors taht were a camera and it helped because I could see him and make sure he was okay but I didnt have to hear the crys.

After he got older I swaddled him for months from about 1month to 6 months old..that really helped him fall asleep....but then he got to big for that and so I began rocking him to sleep and putting him in the co-sleeper.

THen once he got comfortable in the co sleeper to sleep next to the bed, I moved the co-sleeper to his own room for a while and once he got comfortabe in his own room I moved him to the crib..long process....But Yes there were and are many nights when he just doesnt want to go to sleep but I cant have him on my hip 24/7 ykwim?? I love him to death but I felt like i was losing my marbles.....I do let him CIO now if he doesnt want to go to sleep and it used to take about 30 mins and now it really only takes 5-10 mins. The video monitor was the best thing I ever bought because I can see him at all times and see he is safe but I can turn the volume really low so that the screaming isnt in my ear.....


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