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-   -   How often do you play with your children? (http://www.diaperswappers.com/forum/showthread.php?t=992913)

MyM&W 05-23-2010 09:03 PM

How often do you play with your children?
 
Sorry if this has been asked recently. I was just wondering how often you all play with your children?

I have a 4 year old and a 9 month old. I play with them as much as I can in between cleaning and making meals. But I don't know if its enough, my 4 year old is ALWAYS I mean always asking me to play. From the moment we wake up to the moment she goes to bed, shes always asking me "mama wanna play?" She has to ask me that a million times a day. Half the time I tell her "not right now" or "in a few minutes, mommy is busy right now" she always seems to ask me when I'm busy doing something. I'm also one of those people that like to finish what I start. If I'm half way threw dishes I'm not going to stop them and play. She does need to learn to be patient correct? She has little patience.

Now, when I play with my kids I try to interact with both of them, DD (4 year old) isn't really jealous of her 9 month old brother but it seems like I can't even play with him for 2 minutes because she goes "mama wanna play with me" then I start to feel guilty and play with her and then I feel bad for DS. What in the world do I do?? I'm also dealing with PPD, so that doesn't help. ugh..so how often do you play with your children?

Want to add that when DD was an only child she got played with a LOT. I got my cleaning done for the day and we played outside and did lots of activities before ds was born. Maybe I should start doing that (activities) more. Shes got a great imagination and plays with her doll house and babies most days.

stringbean02 05-23-2010 09:07 PM

Re: How often do you play with your children?
 
i stay at home with my 13 month old, so very very often every day.

asteiner18 05-23-2010 09:09 PM

Re: How often do you play with your children?
 
All day long! I try to be only on the computer when they are in bed and if I have to jump on real quick when they are awake they are in here with me and I am singing songs or counting with them ect. We are playing some kind of game no matter what I do :giggle: I will only have so much time with them young so I am trying to make the most of it ;) I completely understand the frustration though and I was worried I was dealing with PPD a while back but stayed off the computer and let a few things go ( housework that could wait, ect) so I could spend more time with the girls and honestly think that helped! Hope that you and your daughter can meet in the middle here soon!

MyM&W 05-23-2010 09:11 PM

Re: How often do you play with your children?
 
I'm a SAHM as well. It just seems like no matter how much I play with her she still wants more. It sounds mean but I can't play with her all day long. I just can't. We will play and after we get done she will ask me to play again not even 10 minutes later.

I'm at a loss.

MyM&W 05-23-2010 09:13 PM

Re: How often do you play with your children?
 
I try to include her in with everything I do..she likes to help with laundry and cooking sometimes, but shes very spirited and when shes in a bad mood there isnt anything to help with that lol.
Ugh its just so hard.
Also that fact that she won't even allow me to spend any 1 on 1 with ds is annoying. When she was 9 months old she was already talking a ton, walking, using her shape sorter and everything. I spent so much time with her and she learned so many things so fast. I know every child is different but I just feel like DS isn't getting enough from me most days because I ALWAYS feel guilty if I don't spend that extra second with her.

With my PPD I'm mostly anxious and have a lot of guilt. I'm seeing a therapist every week and she says that I'm way to hard on myself. I blame a lot of things on myself and feel guilty about things I shouldn't. I'm sure if I didn't have PPD I wouldn't be bothered by this. But. I am.

Esthersmommy 05-23-2010 09:17 PM

Re: How often do you play with your children?
 
My eldest DD always wants me to be doing something with her, which is why I now try to have her involved in my tasks and it satisfies her! If i'm cooking, she's cooking too... if I'm doing laundry, she does too. It eliminate the battle between housework and playtime.

It gets easier and your youngest gets older too! My girls, now 21 months and 4, keep each other very busy playing!

MyM&W 05-23-2010 09:30 PM

Re: How often do you play with your children?
 
So what do you do when she doesn't want to help? Do you continue doing your cooking or laundry or do you play with her?

I can't wait until ds gets a tad older..I mean its so sad that hes 9 months old already but I can't wait to see how they play..actually play! They will play but its short lived at the moment, ds gets moving on to something else really fast haha

Nanner99 05-23-2010 10:58 PM

Re: How often do you play with your children?
 
I have 4- ages 9, 4, 2.5 and 9 mos. So, uh, not that much. :blush: My oldest was an only for 5.5 yrs and I was basically at her beck and call. It really was not healthy for her or me in our case. I talk to the kids a lot, since they like to follow me around and talk to me constantly (mostly the 4 and 2 yr old boys- that is a very talkative age!). I feel like my 9 yr old gets the short end of the stick and I *hate* that, but I am only one person and the little ones just need more care/attention. Other than that, I feel like I spend enough time "playing" with them, plus they all have chores (besides the baby :giggle:) and get positive attention for doing those or helping me out. Honestly, I think some playtime/reading/undivided attention is necessary, but not a ton of it. It's healthy for kids to be bored, learn patience, and figure out how to entertain themselves. Have you tried keeping to a routine where she knows exactly when she can expect one on one time with you? I need to take my own advice on that one, as I need a way to preserve my sanity. lol.

Nanner99 05-23-2010 11:01 PM

Re: How often do you play with your children?
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by MyM&W (Post 10323380)
So what do you do when she doesn't want to help? Do you continue doing your cooking or laundry or do you play with her?

I can't wait until ds gets a tad older..I mean its so sad that hes 9 months old already but I can't wait to see how they play..actually play! They will play but its short lived at the moment, ds gets moving on to something else really fast haha

No! Do what you need to do, offer to let her help, then move on and tell her you will play when you are done. Try setting a timer or doing a routine with playtime built in. Good luck :thumbsup: My oldest was (still is!) very bright but basically relied on me for most of her fun the first 4-5 yrs of her life and it was touch for me to say no.

JustAugust 05-23-2010 11:03 PM

Re: How often do you play with your children?
 
Honestly, hardly ever. Isn't that horrid of me? He's always been wonderful at entertaining himself, so I never really even thought of it. We do lots of things together and talk CONSTANTLY, but as far as me sitting down and actually playing with him with toys or something... like never ever. It makes me feel terrible. But then I realize... we live on a college campus, in a freshman boys dorm (DH's work), and he gets TON of one on one face time/interaction with gobs of people every day. I think he likes playing with those rough and tumble boys and then he comes to me when he wants down time. And DH plays with him constantly, so it's not like he doesn't get played with by any means.


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