05-21-2010, 07:46 PM
Join Date: May 2007
Re: Behavior Charts
I love charts because they hold us much more responsible as parents :P
Like pp said make the charts positive. make it possible to get at least 2 rewards or so a day. That way if he screws up in the morning his whole day isn't shot. Make is so he doesn't loose things if he misbehaves, he just gets extra stuff if he does good. This is all in how you phrase it. Like if he's starting to act up don't say I'm not going to give you ____ say you won't earn _____. Put it all back on him. Make the parents powerless (in his mind).
What I would do is if you start with something he does often given him one cue to stop. Make the one cue a standard, don't let it turn into 2 cues or my so's notorious 1.5 cues .
Start small! After he completely masters that 1 thing then add more. Just one thing at a time.
It just takes you caving one time to really set things back. Changing is hard for him and he doesn't want to do things your way or he would already be doing them. If he sees any chance that he can get away with not changing he will go for it 100%. It will be soooo tempting to cave too because he will be grateful and sweet and you will feel like the best mother ever, until he starts back up.
Oh-another area I see mom's slip up is after their dc starts doing better, like a few weeks down the road. They start to lighten up on the program, thinking their dc doesn't need it anymore and pretty soon you are back where you started.
I didn't start a chat until my son was 4 but he just wouldn't have gotten it. I was mainly working on fit throwing and making sure he got absolutely nothing out of it. Then we worked on pick up and I just made him keep doing it. His reward was being out of my clutches. He's autistic and seems to be on track intelligence wise but conversations are much harder so it is really tricky to know what he gets and what he is pretending to not get (an effective way to get out of many responsibilities).
Suzi, working mama to my ODS(2004),
and married to the love of my life