06-14-2006, 12:12 PM
Join Date: May 2006
I have been watching this one to see where it went. After the poor dugger thread I was not sure. Someone mentioned in so many words that a disabled child not doing chores was not "a burden or a brat" answer to my post.
First we are I hope not speaking of a child with a disability. They are not a burden but a blessing as are all children.
BUT, all children accept those who can do nothing for them selves IE: infants, physically disabled: need to know how to get along in a family, then world situation. It is our gob as parents to teach them to do all things, anything, everything. So it turns out that as the children get older mom gets a little bit of a break. (sort of, we still have to go behind and do it our way or make them stay at it till it is done our way, and that takes just as much time if not more than doing it our selves. Of course this does not apply to all things, some you just have to learn to accept that someone else's way works even though it is not your way. IE: kids teaching mum a few things. )
For us it is handed over when they show interest and capability.
DS 14y is the best house keeper and can cook to boot. He started at about 3 with chores. (picking up his things)
meals started at about 10y's. He wanted to help so I taught him to use the knife properly and he was short order cook. Then it was put a pot on to boil, etc etc. Cleans the bird cage, chore rotation. Anything I tell him gets done just as I would have done it.
DD 13y only realy started at 11y's almost 12y. With the cooking. But she wanted to help change a diaper when she was 7y. I still don't let her do a new born. It is around 3 or 4 months before I let her take over. Then she does it almost totally. Now that we are cloth I clean the poo out but that's about it. Does chore rotation, cleans the cat box, feeds/waters the birds.
DS 9y has been helping in the kitchen. He can bake cookies almost totally by himself. He is also responsible for 3 times a week cleaning dog pooh from the back yard. (we have 7 dogs. ) And he is responsible for watering them and feeding them. On the weekends DH does this for him.
DD 8y (just turned this week) has been given the chore of getting the clothes from the washer and hanging diapers and clothes go to the dryer. She also gets them out and folds them. She also has "kids" bathroom duty. Making sure it stays clean. (she does not do this wonderfully , I often have to remind her) She wants to go on the core rotation but I have not seen that she is ready for that responsibility.
DD6 helps put away clean clothes makes her bed with sister who is 5y and cleans her own room. A room she shares with 3 other sisters. She sets the table helps DD 3ys to the potty when she needs to go. Tells the dogs to stop barking( a constant chore ) and other little things.
DD5y helps with te bed the room and watches the babies and keeps them entertained. Puts her dishes away (they all do) and again any # of little things I can come up with.
DD3y picks up toys, keeps an eye on DD2y has washed dishes with how ever is assigned to the chore.
DD2y can make her own sandwich or get her own snack(we try not to let her do this) she keeps things fairly clean during the process. Takes off her own dirty diaper and brings it to the proper place, helps out where ever she can.
I wash the laundry, clean my own room and bathroom, pay the bills, do all the shopping, cook most meals, keep up with the garage, home school the kids, occasionally relieve the person on kitchen duty, make all the Dr apts, waste to much time on these forums , and run a fairly tight ship.
DH feeds the family, puts a roof over our heads, can make a awesome meal from nothing and an even better one from all the right stuff, bathes the dogs, mows the yard, fixes stuff, vacuums the house, has not changed a diaper in years , and takes the family to the park often 3 or 4 times a week.
Funny thing is, I still have to leave instructions when I leave. Like when I'm laid up in the hospital. The house literally falls apart when I am gone. Dad gets to lax. But he cleans the bathroom and bedroom maticulously so I can be relaxed with new baby. Got to love him.
Sorry so long.