[MommaKatie]

Please take this for exactly what it's worth. I know some would say this is a cruel way to handle it, but it puts the child in charge of their actions and gives a consequence. When I was teaching preschool, I had a child experiencing similar "problems". Knowing there were no physical issues and with the permission of this child's mother, when said child would choose not to use the bathroom, the child was in charge of "accident cleanup" (taking off the wet/dirty clothes, cleaning themselves up, redressing and bagging the dirty items). The only thing I would help with was re-tying shoes. This mother implemented the same tactic at home. There was no anger or reward, it was very matter-of-fact and to the point (i.e. "I see you've had an accident. Let's go get cleaned up."). It took several times at home and school over the course of about a week for this child to realize choosing to wet/soil themselves would no longer be a choice.

If I can be of any help or support please feel free to p.m. me.