Re: I'm high risk, not sure if benefits outweigh..
Some good resources are the ICAN network, especially if you do decide to do a vaginal birth, these women are amazingly supportive. Also, find a midwife if you can for a consult, not that you have to switch your care to a midwife, but I love midwives because I find them to be incredibly helpful and informative, and they may be able to point you toward the right doctor. Adding hypnosis to your care can definitely help as well. I used Hypnobabies for my babies birth and loved it so much I can't stop talking about it, there are some tracks that they offer that are meant to help baby stay in, and there are some c section tracks as well for moms who are planning a c section birth. There can be so many worries as a mom, but if you both feel your family would be more complete with one more baby, I say go for it! And good luck to you!