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Old 05-30-2012, 02:02 PM   #25
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Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Chicago
Posts: 6,184
Re: Breaks from parenting

Of course it's not bad. It's necessary. You don't automatically stop being a human being with your own needs just because you have children. People need a healthy balance. I think it does a disservice to children to put your needs last. They need to learn that their parents are people too and that the world does not revolve around them. Are all their basic needs met and no one is bleeding? Okay then mommy needs 10 minutes of alone time.

We have gotten to a point where it's like a dirty word to say as a mother that you just need a break and you don't actually enjoy spending every waking moment for YEARS with your children. It's okay for me to want to poop in privacy or have a meal without sharing it. That's not selfish or ungrateful. I still love them, I'm still available, I still enjoy being with them. I just know that nurturing myself even for a few minutes a day makes me a better parent.

My problem is like yours though that we have no family, no friends without kids of their own and no babysitter here. Both of our families are in other states. So it ends up being either I go out with friends and DH is home with them or I'm home with the kids and he goes out. Which is fine but we would really like to go out together sometimes. What I would love more than anything though is for someone to come take my kids somewhere else and leave DH and I in the house alone for 2 days. We would sleep for 12 hours straight. That would be glorious.
Married to my soulmate Chris since 2004 Mama to big boy D 8/12/06, Big Girl M 3/7/10 and my sweet new boy E 9/10/12!

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