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Old 05-31-2012, 02:21 PM   #1
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ajane
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Do you think our society's overprotectiveness could do more harm than good?

I'm just curious and figured I would get other viewpoints on it.....to talk it through. I'm wondering if our society's overprotectiveness with our children will end up doing more harm than good. So basically, will sheltering (you can use protecting) what our children do raise them to be less confident/independent when they are older? At what age are they able to start doing things on their own or with friends that we (the parents of our children) don't know really well.

I'm kind of guilty. I would say I'm overprotective, but apparently not as much as others on this board from other threads. I'm not saying being more overprotective is a bad thing though, so don't get me wrong. I will say that my "level" of overprotection is changing (decreasing, lol) as the kids are getting older. Maybe that is normal? I do know that I said somethings when the kids were young that I take back now. Obviously, ages of the kids, scenarios, and situations change that alter our parenting decisions.

Ok, so for some examples. Just last year I wouldn't let our then 7 and 5 year old go up the street in our neighborhood to go to a friends house. The friends house was out of sight and there are no sidewalks. I know the mom and kids and them playing there isn't an issue at all. I don't know the super well (as I won't all of their friends) so obviously I'm a little loose on the overprotection in that aspect. But, this year up the road about 8 houses (again out of eye sight) the one mom always has a big ice cream sundae party outside her house on the last day of school. Will was still napping so I let the girls 8 & 6 go up there without me. I did not "like" it inside of me (meaning it was hard for me to just let them go without me), but I knew they would be fine and they were. Ella (8) has had 2 sleepover b-day parties now at a friends house from her class whose parents I don't know super well. But, it was all the girls from her class. A year or two ago I would have said no way. But, I knew she would be fine and didn't want to hold her back from having fun with the rest of her classmates. I'm glad I let her go, she had tons of fun and would have been the only girl who didn't attend.

Heck, I even had a hard time dropping my 7 and 5 year old off at the full day zoo camp last year. I got over it and did it b/c I knew they would be well taken care of and would love it....which all happened.

I would say we are not a fearful family. We know that bad things happen (even the kids) and that it can happen to anyone at anytime. We teach our kids how to be alert, aware, and as safe as possible. We don't teach them fear or to be afraid......we teach them confidence and awareness.

Maybe the real question is do we become less overprotective as they get older? I would say I'm still very overprotective, but I'm letting them do things they want and should be able to do as a kid........within reason of course. It seems I'm letting them be more independent by letting them do things they want away from me, with proper precautions and awareness.

Please, we all have different opinions so let's be respectful of each other and keep it nice.
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