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Old 06-03-2012, 06:04 PM   #12
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bluedaisyma
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Re: Help:upset and need advice

Quote:
Originally Posted by bigmamakelsey View Post
While I agree to just do the test, I think is is absolutely inappropriate that he waited until NOW to bring this up! How about when you got pregnant? How about AFTER the birth? But, no, 1 day before your DD. Totally insane. I would be so upset and hurt too, mama. Now was not the time.
I personally wouldn't want him at the birth, either. If you're going natural it would probably just make it progress really slowly if you aren't on good terms with eachother.
Have you thought about hiring a doula?
agree

Quote:
Originally Posted by mslulubellekiwi View Post
Thank-you for the responses! He said he did not bring his doubts up earlier because I would've flown back to my own family (who would've loved and accepted him unconditionally, cared mostly that we are healthy and happy). Now it is too late for me to make the twenty plus hour flight back.
Still it was very unfair for him to wait so long to voice his 'valid concerns' and now he is calling me selfish because I don't want him to attend the birth. And calling me selfish for considering having baby closer to my family and support system in the first place. His words mean nothing given that today is DD and his family have rejected baby and I already. Its just me, my big belly and my cat.
When I do get the test results I hope they feel like the pathetic grandparents they are. I won't tell them when I go into labor and won't allow them to see baby till after the results are in. Till then I plan on treating them how I feel baby and I have been, mostly ignored.
I'm just grateful that I hired a doula to assist me thru labor and delivery because I'm going to need all my strength to birth my little girl. I need to be surrounded by Light and Love at this time, baby and I deserve better than this and I'm going to protect her whatever it takes. I want to bring her into the world unmedicated and can only do this if I feel grounded and empowered. I won't allow him to take this from her.
so sorry you are being treated like this. as soon as the baby was born. i'd be on a flight to family....and i wouldn't put his name on the birth cert!
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