Hugs! I also have a 2 yo and a 2 mo...it is a lesson in patience on the best of days. I agree your DH is out of line! Next time he is home you need to leave him with both kids for 4 hours and go to the spa or movies, when you get home ask him why the house is a mess and where your dinner is.
My best advice is get out of the house more. Even if it takes til 11am to get out of the house, you have to nurse in the mall food court and in the car, and you get home late for nap time it is worth it! Cabin fever in a 2 yo is ugly! An outing, a little change of scenery, some socialization and a long nap for the toddler can do wonders for your frustration level at the end of the day.
wife to Kyle
and mommy to Julia
2/15/2010 and Clara