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Old 08-24-2012, 12:21 PM   #32
Computermama
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Re: Anyone get sick of the judgement?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Lilybug1 View Post
Yea, I definitely don't like the judgment thing. I think sometimes the whole " I don't make enough to cover day care costs," is partly justifying their own decision to stay home. Women/moms in general are getting judged and feel like they are getting judged for everything, so I think the justification has a defensive tone to it. There's a book called the Feminine Mistake and addresses this economic argument a bit. It basically says that the money you are losing while being out of the workforce is not just the money you are not earning during those childrearing years, but the ability to return to work and make a decent income when those childrearing years have passed. Not really passing judgment one way or the other, but just saying that there is more to the economics than the here and now. But if you want to stay home and your family can afford it, more power to you!
In my case, before I found the job that I did, it was literally not able to afford it. We were living on a shoestring as it was. The jobs I could find that actually entertained hiring me were day jobs, the same shift DH was on, and paid minimum wage, which is just under $80/day. Daycare here starts at $40/day for full time. We lived in the country, and I don't drive, so I'd have to take a taxi, since DH would alredy be atwork to the tune of about $25 since I'd have to drop DD1 at daycare. So we're talking 65 of my 75 bucks gone on a good day. On a bad day, I wouldn't get a full 8 hour shift, but still have to pay the daycare for a full 8 hours, and probably need to get a cab home, putting me in the hole for the day. We even considered moving into town, but between the drastic rise in rent and the extra gas to get to DH's job, we'd be in the same boat. It wasn't until the afternoon dispatching position opened up that I was able to find a job I could actually make money at since it was afternoons (no childcare) and next door (no transportation).
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