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Old 08-31-2012, 06:38 PM   #26
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Re: Living together before marriage. Yay or nay?

Originally Posted by Iliana View Post
He suggested eloping and I told him no way in hell. That is what I did with my ex and I have still a bitter memory about it. If he was willing to give his ex (a crazy, controlling person) a wedding, why not me? (note: I do not need a crazy huge wedding. A simple, joyful ceremony in front of his family and closest friends would suffice. He still said he was against it).
So he does want to marry you! He's down with eloping and your not because you eloped with your ex, and you want a wedding and he's against it because he did that with his ex? Sounds like he wants to marry you just not with the wedding, and you want to marry him and just not elope. Sounds like your both blaming the wedding/elopement as the cause of the problems leading to the divorce, a been there done that scenario.

What about eloping somewhere romantic and having a nice reception party when you get back?
I can see not being happy with an elopement though. I would want my family to witness any vows I took, but I can also see coming to a compromise to make both of you happy. Maybe a tiny wedding with just the parents and sibs involved, no friends outside of the attendants, and you line it out for him so he sees it's nothing like his previous wedding, budget and everything?

What ever you decide, it sounds like he is committed enough to marry, even if it's not the venue of your choice.
Amber: Mama of 4 DS's; 10/2002 10/2005 8/2007 1/2010
and 1 DD 11/20/13 ************. Married to J .
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