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Old 10-05-2012, 11:51 AM   #28
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cherylchoo
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Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: a Texan in the northern Detroit 'burbs
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Re: Basically it's Friday!

I just feel asleep for 30 minutes and now I'm all confuzzled. I just don't do naps very well, LOL.

Jess, I'm not sure what you are talking about, but if Overdrive is the program the library uses for books...I was done with that years ago. HATE it, is stupid un-user friendly and overcomplicated. And the library made me use Adobe Digital Editions which f''d up half MY books for reading anywhere else. So after that fiasco, I refused to do ebooks/audiobooks for the Nook from the library any more. I instead just get the free books that are available to the Nook (I'm sure Kindle has some too) and I am very selective about the kid books I actually purchase for the Nook. The girls actually prefer real books so we check those out from the library instead.

Janine, that was exactly what I meant by positive consequences for good behavior in a structured program. Something like the top ten list and one of the rewards would be able to watch a show or play computer/Wii for 20 minutes. But she's had so many incidents at school lately she has to get through one whole day without any trouble, without rewards, because that is what she is supposed to do anyway. The "paybacks" thing, like I said is new and she doesn't do it at home because she knows it won't fly here with the Big Boss. At school like I said, there are many "bosses of the moment" so she tries to take advantage of the weaker links.

It's frustrating because like I said she doesn't do most of this at home, at least on her own. We do practice her weak areas at home, and she still does not react well every. single.time but I can keep it from getting out of hand because I have it in a controlled environment. She doesn't hit people at home. She has accidently hit a kid while pitching a fit once, and has kicked a kid once (the "payback" thing), at school. So she has two strikes now. She doesn't understand, or frankly care, how having done these two things have affected her socially at school - like I said there is no embarrassment or social pariah status to motivate her at all. And while I try to teach her to recognize when she's rumbling, so she can stop herself before she gets out of hand...she's not really caring about that either so it's not working.

The ironic thing is she's not an unpleasant greedy person, quite the opposite It's just when the rumbling starts, and it's not headed off, it will eventually pass the point of no return and she explodes with something totally inappropriate. Then she immediately starts saying sorry, and doesn't understand why she isn't completely absolved and forgiven on the spot, and free from any consequences. I guess I should take comfort in the fact that she at least does apologize most of the time, that is an improvement from two years ago.
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Detroit-area SAHM to Rose 12/03, Ginger 11/05, and little Ian 4/08.
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