Re: How to talk to my cousin
Can you perhaps arrange to take up some of her time? Like you need her to babysit the first night because you completely forgot that had to do ABC and you can't get out of it now, but you just cannot find a babysitter. And then maybe you plan a dinner with her for the next night because you are just so excited to have her out to visit and you found this great place to try. You get the idea. Just giving her other stuff to do, and if she's spending time with you guys she's not spending as much time with him.
Another option, could you and your DH perhaps arrange to meet him first? I am not sure how you could arrange that without looking like some overprotective freak...but maybe that's not a bad thing. Lets him know that there IS someone watching out for her.