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Old 10-10-2012, 07:18 PM   #52
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Re: Parenting style: Raising a person

Originally Posted by dissidentdad View Post
I find your bolded statement to be the core of our differences in how we see the world and therefore also our in how we plan to raise our children. I spent time in the Army, and I agree military service is not for everyone and not everyone that serves applies the values they are taught. I will always place the mission first, I will never accept defeat, I will never quit, I will never leave a fallen comrade. These are core values that I apply to every single aspect of my life. The idea that there is any aspect of parenting that is impossible to understand fully given enough effort fills me with emotions that if I described here would get me banned from the site.
I believe you would make history if you could do such a thing. Often children/teens themselves don't know the answer to questions that we seek to answer in them, so how could we manage to figure out what they themselves don't truly know?

I am not happysmiley, but her point makes sense to me. I cannot speak for her, but I wouldn't presume to be able to guide or control the actual emotions, nor would I seek to dismiss them. As a parent, though I would be bound to help my child learn how to work through the emotions and how to express them in an appropriate manner. Basically, I am responsible for teaching my child how to act when faced with whatever emotions come up. The example of grief is perfect in that we teach our children different ways to grieve (crying, remembering, writing, etc.) and how not to grieve (lashing out at those who love us, completely withdrawing,).
Melissa-Wife, mother to DS 4/02 and DD 4/07, DS 7/08 DD 7/13
ISO: my lost shaker of salt
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