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Old 10-10-2012, 08:13 PM   #54
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Re: Parenting style: Raising a person

Originally Posted by dissidentdad View Post
Every person who has made history set out by doing one thing first, trying something that hadn't already been done.

I agree that rage is never an appropriate reaction to the death of a loved one, anger (which is an emotion and needs to be learned ) on the other hand, in the case of an unnecessary preventable death, can be the correct emotion. Also, crying is not required, neither is the mandatory sharing of your emotions, and often times this is where lashing out comes from, being required to act the way other people feel is appropriate. There is also a difference between completely withdrawing in the fashion of depression, and the want for quiet personal introspection.
Yup. I agree with this all. I think this is what happysmiley was getting at though. Or at least what I took from it.

My main point was simply that as parents, we guide the actions and behaviors which are not the same as guiding the emotions. We teach them how to express them in the most effective way (for them as an individual) and in ways that aren't destructive to themselves or those around them. Is this a sign of us wanting to control our children or make them extensions of ourselves?

ETA: This entire thread reminds me of the Parenting Day I attended yesterday at my son's school. They introduced us to this new program called "The Leader in Me" and told us how awesome it is and how it would change the entire culture of the school. Then they showed us how it works, the concepts behind it, etc. It's the same thing I've seen in schools and homes since I was a kid. It's just been repackaged and the buzz words have changed from individual to leader. It's still the same basic concept.
Melissa-Wife, mother to DS 4/02 and DD 4/07, DS 7/08 DD 7/13
ISO: my lost shaker of salt

Last edited by mcpforever; 10-10-2012 at 08:19 PM.
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