WWYD (sensitive topic, bullying and more)
My son is active, and nearly 13 years old. He's a fairly bright kid, but doesn't take school seriously (how many preteen boys do?). Anyway, he's also in football, and it's pretty draining as it's 6 days a week for 2+ hours each day (not including games).
Anway, my son has seemed frustrated with football, and talking about quitting. The season is only 1 more month, and I asked if he would try and stick it out just that much more, and he'd feel good about himself for accomplishing something so big.
Anyway, last week was open house at school, and I talked to my sons teachers, and a few of them confided in me that he's not completing his homework lately, and is becomming goofy and distracting the other students.
I talked to him about it, and he said he'd change. But, yesterday his math teacher called me and said it's worse, and another teacher said the same thing. I asked him to stop or else he would get detention. I also told him that we will be removing all electronics from his room until he catches up and does better in school.
Today, I get not 1, but 2 phone calls from the asst principal. 1st one the principal tells me that the kids just had an assembly at school about anti bullying. within minutes of the assembly, my son puts a kick me sign on another student and kicks him!! I was mortified as my son has never got into trouble like this before. He's never caused trouble in a serious manner like this. He received detention at lunch. A few hours later the asst principal called again saying that my son received a referal from the bus company stating he was jumping around on the bus! So, he got 45 min detention after school. I didn't know what to do.
After school and detention (twice in 1 day), I drove him to football.
I told him I decided his punishment was to do a day's worth of community service and help the elderly. He complied.
After my husband picks him up, my son was in a horrible mood. I wanted to know what was going on. This wasn't like him at all.
He said his coach was harrassing him, and being mean. He was making him do extra exercises in front of the other kids while he used his whistle between each exercise until my son couldn't do any more. He also made another kid do the same thing. The other kids stood in a circle to watch as the coach basically embarrassed the 2 boys for several minutes for missing practice yesterday. Other kids miss practice all the time, but nothing was ever done, until today. My son and the other kid also lost their positions in football, and are not "subs", which is humiliating, and down right awful. They won't be playing any more games!! All this from missing 1 practice. You know how I found out about this???? From the other mother who told me....not from my son. When I asked my son if this was true, he said yes, and wanted to quit.
I felt so badly for my son! This has been going on for a bit now. The coach is picking out my son from the other players and being a bully to my kid!!!!!!
I can understand why my son is acting this way now. What do I do???? I don't want to punish my son now. I feel so horrible. My own son being bullied by an adult. Why didn't I let him quit when he wanted to before? Why didn't I listen to my motherly instinct as I could tell something was going on?
I'm going to talk to the asst principal about this Monday. I want to beat on that coach for acting this way to my son and the other boy. The coach is supposed to be a mentor. Not pick on a specific child for missing 1 practice. I could see if he did that with all kids that missed practice, but not JUST my kid and the other one. And to hear this from another mother?? AHHHH!!!!
What would you do?
Hi! I'm a mama of 5 amazing beautiful children! 3 boys, 2 girls.