Re: Toddler and Newborn, how long for the "adjustment phase"...
I second the PPs who said that the adjustment period is 4-6 months. Our transition was....pretty horrendous. Very similar to what you're describing. By the time the baby was six months old things really were back to normal (well, I mean, having a 2.5 year old is no walk in the park, but things were at a 2.5 year old level of "normal" )
I know that, now, you're 2 weeks in and thinking that 6 months is an eternity. You will get there! Just keep ignoring the bad stuff as much as possible and praising the good stuff. Whenever things got really bad, it helped me to sort of reset and think about just how hard and stressful having a new baby was on my older one. It's just as life changing for them as it is for us. And! cash in your babysitting points with anyone and everyone you can think of!
Kate, mama to 2 crazy boys, Owen (March 2009) and Rory (August 2011)