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Old 10-29-2012, 11:22 AM   #27
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Join Date: Sep 2012
Posts: 205
Re: What would you do?

Originally Posted by mommy2kaitlyn View Post
Let me get this right? It is ok to reward someone because they have a medical condition but did something wrong? BTW I have ADD myself!
I know for a fact that my DD will not learn a thing if she is allowed to her. She doesn't even care about the costume at the moment except to trick or treat. She tried to bribe me with the idea of no costume to get to go. So obviously she is ok with that. She brought that up this morning, my mom had suggested it and she must have over heard it or something.

I guess I may be a little unreasonable here to most here obviously. I was wondering what others would do and I get that. I do appreciate it.
There is a difference between rewarding someone and not punishing them. To me, rewarding your daughter would be getting her a new costume. The natural consequence of losing the costume would be that she has to go without a costume or make her own.

You seem to think that your daughter has diagnosable attention issues, but it is not clear to me from your post that she is getting services/assistance with the problem (perhaps she is--you don't say). She is a child and therefore can't be expected to manage the medical issue on her own; and particularly if she is not getting help, then it seems deeply unfair to expect her to behave like a child who does not have ADD/ADHD.

My daughter has life-threatening food allergies. We do everything in our power to teach her to manage them and keep herself safe. But she's still a child. If she made a mistake or was careless and ate something that caused a reaction, I wouldn't "punish" her. I would continue to work on teaching her how to manage her medical issues.
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