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Old 11-11-2012, 01:41 PM   #22
BeccaSueCongdon's Avatar
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Originally Posted by BeccaSueCongdon

This is a good clarification - it's within a doulas role to ask a question for mom like this, but not to provide the answer for her in place of the provider, if that makes sense.

Regarding decels: I've read as extensively as I could (as extensively as I think a layperson CAN) and I feel like I have a good grasp on them. But I also understand that I did that reading over the course of a few months on te Internet, and not in medical school. I would never dream of interpreting that info for a mom. The appropriate way to address stuff like that is to ask the nurse how things are going and if she has a moment to explain it to mama and educate us.
Also, to add to what I was saying, I think asking questions for mom like "how would it be if she did x/y/z now?" Instead of posing it as a demand. That approach of fighting for moms rights really hurts mom in the long run, I think. And it disrespects the birth team. The nurses and midwives/doctors involved in her care are real people with their own experiences and backgrounds that shape how they approach birth, mom and the doula. And starting out with a demanding and defensive stance disrespects not only their contribution to the birth but also lays the foundation for a negative view of doulas in the future and creates barriers for the profession and for moms who want their support.
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