My husband knows his mother (and grandmother! - she's part of the whole dysfunction package) is troubled and he sympathizes with me. He'll always go to bat for me if batting is needed, but at this point everyone knows the score. The bottom line is, I have to deal with her. My daughter has grown close to her (them) and I honor that. So when she does wacky things or tells white lies, as long as she isn't hurting my daughter I let it slide. I'm not letting her hook into my son the same way though.
I just want to say though that she keeps talking with such pride about how my sil, her single, childless daughter, is cooking the whole thanksgiving dinner (we aren't going) for ALL 5 of them just like last year. It's like the only meal she cooks ever all year. Uh yeah, great, now let's see her prepare meals for a family of 4 three+ times a day. Then I'll be impressed.
I run the Frontier Wholesale co-op in February, May, August & November