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Old 11-26-2012, 12:25 AM   #21
InBloomDoula's Avatar
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Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Florida
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Re: Trying not to judge another mom...

Originally Posted by mayasmomma View Post

So, the situation is a little complicated. An old male friend of mine married a woman who has a blog and posts all things baby - which I enjoy reading - but I cringe when I read or see some of the things she does with their child. I feel like I can't say anything because she thinks I had a past with her husband - I never did - I was always dating my now husband and the feelings were never mutual (he may have liked me). That's besides the point - but part of why I feel uncomfortable sticking my opinion out there.

Recently she posted pictures of their 7 month old baby in switched into a convertible car seat but facing FORWARD. I think she's under the impression that convertibles are only forward facing from the way she worded the blog posting. He's 7 months old! I really do try hard not to judge. Yes, in the past we were all lucky to be in car seats at all and we were probably forward facing if we were. Facts show how dangerous this is - we're lucky to have the facts now to make the correct choices. Right?

There are many, many other things but I've found maybe we're just more strict with things up here in the Northeast? They live in the deep south. They gave their newborn bottles of apple juice. Instead of ever giving formula they gave soy milk (he had no allergies to indicate having to feed him specially). They put him in a bumbo seat & a doorway swing at 1 month old, slouched over & not able to hold his head up.

It's not my place right? Should I just keep my mouth shut like I have been? My husband wants me to speak up because he's afraid she's endangering the baby. I'm not sure if her husband knows of all these things either.

Any advice? I'm at a loss!
I'm from the "deep South" and I've never done any of the things you mentioned which you are judging this mom for. While I don't agree with her either, I do think you've got a poor attitude about the situation. If you are close to her and think your opinion is desired and will be received well then go ahead and offer her some more info on the car seat situation. Otherwise, it seems unwise to go prying into her life and putting your concerns out there when they won't do any good to help the child.
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