Re: which HE washers allow hot hot water?
I had a Samsung FL that I traded in; the 'hot' water was only about 80 degrees d/t some wacky energy saving regulations. I had it serviced and the repairman told me that there was nothing wrong with the machine, it was supposed to be like that. The sanitary cycle was the only cycle that actually had hot water, but it was like a 3 hour long cycle.
I traded it in for a Whirlpool Duet FL, I am actually happy with it. From reading the manual, the whitest whites setting uses an on board heater to keep the water on "hot" at 127 F, or the Sanitary cycle at 150 F. I use "hot" for diapers and so far no problems.
The reasons "hot" cycles often don't end up hot are: 1. water that first comes out of the pipes is cold 2. the drum is cold, so the hot water loses some heat from that and 3. wacky regulations about being energy efficient mean that cold water gets mixed in with the hot.
Salesmen that I talked to were pretty clueless about the whole hot water thing. Good luck shopping.