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Old 12-05-2012, 09:53 PM   #22
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keen1981
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Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: San Diego, CA
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Quote:
Originally Posted by newmommy13
I declined all testing and had an out of hospital birth where we discovered baby has a birth defect. We both almost died. My dds disability could not be detected on an us but my whole world came crashing down that night. We were so shocked, it was so hard to come to terms with on top of all the chaos of transferring and emergency care.

My reason for declining testing (only a 13 wk us was offered, no 20 wk was covered!) was that we wouldn't terminate the pregnancy if for example there were downs markers. My experience made me realize that I could have had months to come to terms with a special needs child rather than the cold hard slap in the face that I had after my 27 hour labor. False positives exist but id rather have a happy surprise than the one I had.
This. I had a child born with a heart defect that would have been difficult to see at a 20 week scan. 26 weeks would have been better.. He had heart surgery just shy of 4 months of age. With this baby- he automatically has a 5% of a heart defect (not same one either• it's 5% of anything) and while we would NOT abort/ we wanted to be sure that we knew if something was wrong before it was too late. Luckily my sons was detected, but it took time and we were so damn lucky it was BEFORE he turned blue and crashed. :/ I also will never try for it to be bumped up for the very reason that the bigger the baby, the more developed things are. So as anxious as we are 18-19 weeks- heck I'd go as late as they allowed. Having a child with a congenital defect changes ur feelings on a lot of things..
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