12-08-2012, 12:41 PM
Join Date: Mar 2008
Re: How to break the news to a friend struggling
Rebecca-how awful for your friend with the stillbirth. I had a 24 weeker born still and a friend of mine who was 8 months pregnant at the time showed up at the funeral. I don't remember feeling anything negative toward her. I only could think "gosh, what I would give for my baby to still be in my belly."
Pregnancy before last, I told bff, I used the same line as you, the I hope you get preggers soon so we can be preggers together. Won't work well this time since they've been trying 4+ yrs tho
Love4leon- for your friend to tell you that you getting pregnant sent her into a depression is just downright wrong. Sounds like she doesn't want you to have any joy, but instead, feel guilty because it worked for you. Sort of like, say, if my Mom died, me wishing everyone else's were dead, too.
I haven't dealt with infertility before, but I know that if I did, I wouldn't want other people to feel pain just because I do.
And, I guess in an effort to say something nicer about your friend--I'm sure she probably liked having a friend who she could share her struggles and disappointments in and maybe she feels like she's lost that now. You may be the only one she talks to about it. I hope for you and friendship's sake, that after she takes the time she needs, she apologizes. It is hard to have a friend for soooo long and it go up in smoke seemingly overnight over something that shouldn't be an issue. And also hard to realize that a friend is not the person (inside) you thought they were. Going through that myself. "cling to family" is my motto.
Homeschooling Momma to 19 yo DD
, 16yo DS
, 13 yo DD, 5yoDD,4 yo DD, 1 yo DD
, 1 month old DD
and 6 angels I'll get to see in Heaven one day.