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Old 01-18-2013, 07:39 PM   #5
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catilina
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Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Beautiful Oregon!
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Re: SAHPs: How much do you play with your kids?

So how exactly do you teach your kids how to work it out? Mine are 6 and 3 and no matter how often I talk them through conflict-resolution, they just won't do it. They scream at each other, yell, DD hits with toys or pinches... So I separate them but DD just won't stay put in her room. They can be playing together just fine so I decide to go try to get a load of dishes done, and then literally the second I get to the kitchen, I hear yelling (usually DS), then screaming (DD), then crying (DS because DD hurt him). By the time I get back to them, they are both crying and screaming. We work it out or I separate them and it repeats, ad nauseum, all day long. My 6 year old is super intense and emotionally explosive, and now my 3 year old is picking up on his behaviors. I'm going crazy! I am either bored to tears and unproductive, or completely stressed out from breaking up fights (or both).

Unfortunately right now the weather's not great for playing outside. In the summer my kids play outside quite a bit, and can generally play okay with each other outside (and if they fight they are just out the screen door from the kitchen so I can watch and intervene if needed). With the rain and freezing fog and other Oregon winter stuff, we are inside a lot, and they mostly play in the toyroom or other part of the house, whereas I usually have things to do in the kitchen/laundry area.

I just don't know if maybe my expectations are off, and maybe I should be just spending my entire days doing things with them or just being in the room with them while they play. With either kid, when they are on their own without the other, they play fine by themselves and can entertain themselves. But the second they are together they are at each other's throats.
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