I don't think you are terrible at all! I had an epidural with both of my boys and loved my labors. I would never do it any other way, if I had a choice. I say, go with what you are most comfortable with. Birth is the most personal experience there is and there is no wrong way to bring life into the world.
Wife to the best man I have ever met. Stay-at-home mom to 2 boys and a new baby girl.
“You have your way. I have my way. As for the right way, the correct way, and the only way, it does not exist.”~Friedrich Nietzsche