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Old 02-14-2013, 06:43 AM   #15
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3 ladybugs
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Join Date: May 2008
Location: New Jersey
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Re: Drinking in your family

Originally Posted by Melinda29 View Post
I grew up with it.

No, what you re describing is not "normal" or "average".

I wish you strength. You will likely have some hard choices to make in the next few years. Hopefully a move will help, maybe he would even see the truth after that and be willing to get help. If not . . .

My dad did finally quit drinking after 35 years of alcoholism. He now has acute liver failure
However my father has a perfect liver. He is VERY lucky.

My DH drinks a beer every now and then. Maybe at the most 2 beers in one night. My step father drinks ALL THE TIME. It is part of who he is. I used to really worry about this and how I could teach my son(s) how to deal with this when he gets older but now I realize that I can't protect my child from everything. I don't drink and DS NEVER sees me drink. So I think by me not drinking I can set a good example for him and if he ever asks why I don't drink, I will tell him about his grandfather and great grandfather (who was abusive when he drank) and how I would never want that for him. I probably would also go into the genetics of it if he is old enough to understand that. If that doesn't work, I could just have my dad take out his dentures and show him how many teeth he has because for my father it didn't stop at alcohol and his meth addiction took away his teeth. That is bound to get the point across!

OP - I am sorry your dealing with this but one thing I learned was no matter how many wives wanted my dad to get sober/clean, until he wanted it, there was nothing anyone could do. My father is very open with the fact that when he hit bottom he knew he had 2 choices. Live or die, and thankfully he choose to live. He has been clean for about 15 years now. Before he got clean he went through 2 marriages and my younger sister will not talk to him because of her childhood (when he was hitting rock bottom).
Jennifer (39) - Wife since 12/2003 with 5 children - 3 waiting for me in heaven , and 2 delighting me everyday ! Lymphoma survivor and mother to baby born post pelvic radiation!
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